Nothing says college more than shotgunning beers and watching people find themselves in dangerous situations, right? It’s been a warm winter here in ‘Merica, so while we had to restrain ourselves from the normal ice-luge on fat girls race down Village Hill, we can see an early event in our annual wheelchair race down that treacherous slope.
“But I miss luging on fat girls” Says the downtrodden frat-guy.
Too bad champ, there’s always next year.
“But I’m graduating”
You’ll be coming back weekly til you’re thirty, don’t act like it’s the end of the world.
The wheelchair race is sure to give students something to do on the weekend. Instead of the normal tumbleweed situation at Ramapo, you can expect students to be at least somewhat visible on campus.
“I guess I’ll take a break from StumbleUpon for like 20 minutes to see the race” Said this depressed (normal) weekender.
Other Students have big plans: “I’m getting all of my friends, we’re shotgunning keystones and chugging majorska from 12 til 4am!” …They’ll be sleeping by midnight.
The wheelchair bound students taking part in the race are also gearing up. They’ve been practicing time trials down the hill near Overlook for weeks and progress is smooth. “I’m moving fast, but dodging deer is not easy in a wheelchair!” said one racer with a nervous laugh and a bruised body.
No one knows what will happen, The excitement is building up on Campus..
SUNDAY, SUNDAY, SUNDAY
Come on down and watch something absolutely ridiculous