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Product Review: The Newly-Resurrected Astro Pop
Astro Pops, the classic conical suckers with fruity, tricolor tiers, are back on the market after an eight-year hiatus. With Tricks and Treats Night fast approaching, my research assistant from Phi Beta Kappa sorority house volunteered to test the newly-returned candies with me. Food scientists designed Astro Pops to be poured directly into a plastic... MORE »
Frat Party Music 20 Years Ago
The year is 1992. Bill Clinton has just begun his non-scandalous term in office. Aladdin is dominating the box office while people argue that this whole Disney animation thing is “just a phase.” And Microsoft released Windows 3.1, forever solidifying its place as the best computer software ever. In essence, 1992 was nirvana. Because “Smells... MORE »
Things I Hate About Females. Written by a Female.
Look, don’t let the title of this article fool you. I love being a girl. There’s nothing more satisfying than being able to have casual sex every weekend simply by wearing a low cut top with something shiny and distracting on it and mentioning that I have an N64 to go along with my piece... MORE »
SC goes Greek ““ student, faculty rankings will be based on hotness
The who’s-best of who’s-Greek is widely agreed upon and familiar to sisters, bros, and many GDIs on campus alike. With new pledge classes the past couple weeks come sorority and fraternity rankings, roughly ordered ““ in the name of tradition and indisputable science-facts. A pioneering administrative team liked the idea of encouraging competitive spirit: “we... MORE »
Formal Season
What do Cornell students like better Christmas or Formal Season? Christmas…lets be real, but seriously Formal Season is a great second. There’s nothing Cornell students love more than getting all dressed up in their Frattiest Sunday Best and getting on buses like herds of sheep (just a lot more drunk) and then dancing and making... MORE »
D-List Frat Plans a Mixer With A-List Sorority
No one shows up. MORE »
Paddy Murphy: The Ultimate Wingman
This week it has been announced by the SU sororities’, that they are “so over” Edward Cullen and “that whole vampire thing”. The ladies of SU’s Greek life have moved on to greener pastures and more mysterious men. So mysterious, that this man they’ve move on to, is in fact, a ghost. No, it’s... MORE »
USC Greeks on Social Ban: What Hath God Wrought?
Misery and despair swept the USC campus this week after a sweeping social ban hit fraternity row. What was formerly “Thirsty Thursday” became “Thoroughly Depressing Thursday,” and what used to be “Fratty Friday” became “Stop Playing That Fucking Rebecca Black Song, It’s Not Funny Sober.” Evidence of lives upturned and dreams shattered could be... MORE »
Ladies on the Row go green to address clothing shortage
Frequenters of the Row may have noticed a pattern running rampant among the young ladies these days: noticeably sparse amounts of clothing. However, these highly respectable women want everyone to know this is no fashion trend. This is about taking action for a good cause. “The environment is a really good cause,” says senior Michelle... MORE »