The beginning of the semester here at
Ramapo College has a lot to offer to its students. Hope,
opportunity, a chance to raise one’s GPA, and more importantly, a
chance to pray on potential lays on Luminis. Luminis is an online
platform used by teachers to post assignments, schedules, syllabi,
and any other information pertaining to the class, like the class

Let’s face it, folks, this whole
Luminis thing may as well have been designed by a registered sex
offender. The fact that the class roster is posted with an actual
listing of the first and last names of every student in the class allows for those of us with any ambition of getting laid to check
out the class roster before the class has even begun its first
session, and request those who stir up an interest within our sexual
organs on Facebook.

However, there is always the
possibility that maybe these friend requests will be ignored. That’s
where the reliable poke comes in. If the friend request is perceived
as creepy, the poke is a safe fall back to let that particular person
know: ” Hey, I just want you to know I don’t wanna jump into a
friendship just yet, but I have written you down on my personal draft
board of those people I would potentially do the no-pants dance

So, although Luminis can be a useful
tool for teachers to communicate assignments and schedules to
students, it is also a useful tool for those who are desperately
trying to get laid. Another useful tactic is to trade user-names and
passwords with fellow students, so as to view the rosters of other
classes, and bump up the number of potential prospects. So while on
Luminis, creep hard, creep smart, and while you’re at it, check out
this week’s homework assignment for your Sociology class.