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Syllabus Week, known as the “Festival of Natty Lights” to many, will soon be upon us once more. Though widely celebrate by most college students, there are many who have forgotten the true meaning of the weeklong celebration. To remind us why we celebrate Syllabus Week, we have decided to retell the story of how... MORE »
In an effort to ensure that this year’s shopper-on-shopper violence occurs in a more organized and entertaining fashion, Walmart has instituted new Hunger Games-style death matches for its customers on Black Friday 2012. Based on the popular dystopian novels in which a tyrannical government forces children to fight to the death in special televised events,... MORE »
If I could live in the Consumer Value Store, I would. For the most part, this is not a hyperbolical statement. My truly absurd reliance on CVS (see I actually went through the effort of finding out what the letters stand for, I really do care), however, is the topic for another article and probably... MORE »
In light of the current atmosphere of increased attention to other cultures, Mizzou officials look to cover all their bases this holiday season by providing dÃ©cor and activities in celebration of not only all present holidays but also any future holidays celebrated by religions not yet practiced. “According to the 2008 American Religious Identification Survey,... MORE »
Hey Basement dwellers, At this point, you’re probably wondering, “How could they possibly have made a sequel to Ghost Rider?!” You’re probably also wondering, more relevantly, “What the hell is going on with the Inaugural Campus Basement “Let’s Keep This Website Awesome Over Winter Break” Tournament? I mean, is this thing ever going to end?”... MORE »
This article is part of our “Let’s Keep This Website Awesome Over Winter Break” Tournament series. Check out the opposing article here and be sure to ‘like’ your favorite! College students, behold, one of the best creations our society has bestowed upon us: New Years Eve. Alas, the day in which we ring in the new... MORE »
This article is part of our “Let’s Keep This Website Awesome Over Winter Break” Tournament series. Check out the opposing article here and be sure to ‘like’ your favorite! Co-written with Basement Boss Alex Piliouras.10. Get a Job, Grouch!You’re spending hundreds of thousands of dollars to binge drink, eat Hot Pockets, and occasionally sit in... MORE »
Hey Basement dwellers, Thanks for all of your support during Round One of the Inaugural Campus Basement “Let’s Keep This Website Awesome Over Winter Break” Tournament! Round One went like Michael Phelps: awkward on TV and with lots of marijuana. But aside from that, it went swimmingly. At the end of Round One, USC has... MORE »
David Steinberg was eager to get home from college for winter break; he couldn’t wait to celebrate Hanukkah with his family. “I love all of the family traditions,” he was overheard saying to his campus Hillel representative, “we light the menorah, sing Hanukkah songs, and play dreidel, what could be better?” David’s explanation seemed a... MORE »