You might have seen floppy yellow poles scattered around the Senior Village at Ramapo College, and wondered what their purpose could be. Well…

While the administration may tell you it’s a smart way to keep snow plows from plowing over the grass this winter (or October), it’s actually a strategic initiative implemented by Ramapo’s new, secretive organization; “Pushing Boundaries”: a radical coalition that plans to make Ramapo the top college in the state of New Jersey.

The floppy yellow spears are a call to arms against the latest threat to RPB’s (Ramapo Pushing Boundaries) mission; Public Safety.

In the 2010/2011 academic school year, Public Safety unrelentingly handed out violations and fines. As a result, many eligible students declined offers to attend Ramapo in the following school year, and thus RPB was born.

An anonymous RPB spokesman comments: “The spears are not remotely dangerous aside from a potential poke in the eye, but serve as a stern warning from the students to Public Safety. Our hope is that there is one student out there who is decent at fencing and can lead the rest of his or her peers in a similar offensive tactic.”

RPB claims that they are not afraid to take even more extreme measures, if need be. “All that’s left to say is, we’re going to be the best school in New Jersey, we’re steamrolling the competition, pushing all the mother fucking boundaries, and Princeton…we’re coming for you.”