After not getting enough funding for posters and signs, Ramapo professors protested today’s protest at the arch. The turnout, which was anticipated to be well over fifty consisted only of a handful of Ramapo professors that can’t understand English.
The teachers who attended were seen walking back and forth from the arch to the Bradley for over an hour before realizing that they caught Mercer during his daily nap. “We try make difference and big change,” says one anonymous professor. “We won’t rest until we get contract.”
Among the professors who didn’t attend was Christopher Johnson, an English professor who thinks that the boycott is just a waste of time. “The Ramapo teachers union is wasting its time trying to pursue new contracts. All the money that would have went toward paying them was spent giving Figurehead Mercer his annual $100,000 dollar bonus.”
In addition to today’s protest, a majority of Ramapo professors will also boycott this spring’s upcoming graduation. The more Mercer is seen walking around campus with his uppity bowtie like he’s important the more teachers that decide that they will not attend graduation. Several professors have also been overheard encouraging their students to fuck shit up around campus. “Let’s Battle in Seattle this shit and let the man know we need business,” one professor was heard saying to her class.
After hearing an anonymous report, Mahwah PD has rushed to campus to avoid any future on campus riots.
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