Sophomore Brian Carter had an hour in between two afternoon
classes last Monday so he thought he would buy his textbooks to pass the time.

Little did he know that 168 hours later he would still be
waiting in line.

“I thought the line for the Aerosmith Rock  “n’ Rollercoaster at Disney World was
long,” remarked Carter. “At least at the end of that line they don’t make you
pay $350 for books that you’ll only use during finals week.”

The Schine Bookstore, located in the Schine Student Center,
is on pace to set Central New York records for longest lines ever experienced.
Previous records included the lines to get into the 2009 Syracuse vs. Villanova
basketball game, the lines to get into a Syracuse University fraternity party
on Halloween, as well as the line to purchase “Fried Oreo Alligator” at the New
York State Fair.

Other universities in the area, such as SUNY Oswego and
Ithaca College, have curbed the length of their textbook lines by using a
managerial tactic called “opening up a couple more registers.” So far, the
tactic has been met with what Borat would call “much great success.”

Follett’s Orange Bookstore, the other place on the SU campus
to buy books, has experienced similar lines to the Schine Bookstore. Rather
than have more clerks to check out students, the store has elected to hire
“backpack checker-placer guys.” The line to have your backpack checked is a
short 14-hour wait.

The long lines in both bookstores have been a trend that has
continually grown over many, many years, yet neither of the stores has
attempted to fix it. 

Many students have commented that they understand that a few
more credit card machines would cost the university quite a bit of coin; however,
with how many dolla dolla bills the university accrues with each $75 sale of a
“Syracuse University ONLY Human Sexuality textbook,” the consensus agrees that
it wouldn’t be that big of a deal to have a few more checkout places.

In regard to this story, the Student Center Bookstore
released only one comment, “These kids will wait in our lines and spend big
money here come rain or Schine.”

Syracuse University students agree that the length of the
bookstore lines are more laughable than the store’s puns.