tagged graduation »

Article by maxmartinez
May 30, 2012

MUST READ: Grads Caught Doing Keg-Stands on President Skorton’s Roof

Out of all the crazy stories we have heard from senior week, this has to be the craziest one by far. Let’s just say recent-grads, President Skorton’s roof, and keg-stands do not go together. On Sunday night, at approximately 2 a.m., police were called to the Skorton residence by the President himself. He believed that... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 26, 2012

Skorton and Bloomberg to Host Party at Level B

With convocation finished, and students off with their families and friends enjoying the moment, it’s time for the big guys to have fun. Tonight, at Level B, President David J. Skorton and convocation speaker and New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg will be hosting an invite-only dance party. The party was not supposed to be... MORE »

Article by sambo24
May 8, 2012

Special Senior Dinner Ends In Shit Storm

Most folks with a higher education can look back at their final week of college and recall seven days of drunken havoc, poor decisions, questionable morals, and loose women. A Ramapo graduate, however, can look back fondly upon snack time in the alcohol-free tent, finger painting, a police presence, and being quarantined in the Village.... MORE »

Article by Lia Woodward
April 26, 2012

Research finds “Commencement” is no longer a terminal illness

The class of 2012 and all its friends can breath a collective sigh of relief about at least one thing as May 11th approaches, thanks to some timely research conducted by the University of Southern California. According to chief researchers, 98% of the student body was under the impression that Commencement,  or “graduation”  in dirty... MORE »

Article by Eric Pratt
April 1, 2012

Make Some April Fools!

It’s that day again, dear readers.  It is a day of enlightenment, for us all to share in new beliefs.  Today, gullible is written on the ceiling, genetically-engineered winged pigs have escaped their containment tanks, and HBO canceled Game of Thrones on a whim at 12:00 AM.  Really! Anyone with half a brain can become... MORE »

Article by GnarlySkarz
March 30, 2012

The Grand Graduation Ceremony

Although graduating in Newark has its own excitements, we all know what graduation will actually be like…   MORE »

Article by Jared Martin
March 17, 2012

Columbians Withhold Sex Over Obama Controversy, Barnard Women Rejoice

On Saturday, March 3rd, Lindsay Lohan debuted her new inflatable face on Saturday Night Live, scaring children, parole officers, and Aaron Samuelsez across this great nation. In equally exciting news, March 3rd brought with it the announcement that President Barack Obama will be speaking at Barnard College, the most prestigious of all female colleges barring Rupaul’s... MORE »

Article by J.D.Basement
March 17, 2012

The Goodbye Guidebook: How to Sever Ties With Those People Before Graduation

Saying goodbye sucks. Unless you’re saying goodbye to Ramapo, which will be a joyous occasion celebrated on May 16th in the car-theft capital of America. But as far as saying goodbye to people, it can get a little dicey. For true friends, it won’t be too complicated, as you guys have already booked a house in... MORE »