Mahwah, NJ- The Ramapo infirmary is overflowing with students today, as news broke that a real party may be on the horizon. The prospect of breaking out of the comfort zone of 12-person gatherings in the Village and venturing south to Trenton on October 25th for a Barstool Blackout FOAM party has scared dozens of Ramapo students into a state of paralysis. “What do I do at a good party?” questions Ramapo resident, Allie Steever. “Do I still just hover awkwardly in the corner, constantly refreshing my Facebook news feed?”

These FOAM parties, which have been known to fill a room with 1000’s of people and multiple feet of bubbly foam, are rumored to be something completely foreign to a Ramapo event… fun. Ramapo Sophomore, Jimmy Donawitz confessed after waking up from his coma, “My friend told me that there’s gonna be like 3,000 half naked girls there and then all of a sudden everything went black. The next thing I know, I’m waking up here with text messages about playing Mario Kart in 20 E tonight. That’s much more my speed. I feel better now.”

Multiple sources have also confirmed that upon visiting the ticket sales site for the Trenton party on October 25th, at least 50 Ramapo students foamed at the mouth and had a seizure.