On January 9th, the Alabama Crimson Tide rode an historic defensive performance to a 21-0 rout of the LSU Tigers, and an unquestionable claim to the national championship. One month later, students at Emory are still irked by the stubbornness of the BCS committee.
“I can’t believe this,” spoke out one student, who asked to remain nameless. “Alabama is sitting at number one with a loss to their record. Emory football didn’t lose a game all year. Hell, we haven’t lost a game in 175 years.”
It’s true. Since the school’s establishment in 1836, Emory University football has never faltered against its competition. Sure, the school has never organized an actual football team, let alone played a game, but the Emory student body doesn’t seem to see this as adequate reasoning for being left out of the final BCS standings. The success of the football program has forever been a massive point of pride for students at Emory, despite their controversial record.
While the BCS committee itself could not be reached for comment for this article, they did send a generic email listing reasons why they refuse to allow certain teams to play in their biggest games. The highlights of the list included:
-Teams must have played more games than the girls at Barnard
-Teams must have at least 10 players who did not pass the SAT on their own
-Teams with the letter “E” in their names must not place this letter at the very beginning or end of their school name (this one killed Boise State and plagues Emory as well, but obviously Oregon was off the hook)
The final BCS standings, which failed to include Emory in its 25 team ranking, sent a shockwave throughout the campus. Many students had to be detained by campus police for rioting in favor of their beloved Eagles.
“They’re never going to acknowledge us if we don’t fight for our respect,” argued one student, recently released from the campus police department. “These Alabama fans think that being the best means that you’re allowed to lose a game. That’s not right. When you’re the best, you’re perfect, and apparently that’s something that requires a score higher than 1500 on the SAT to understand. Emory is the gold standard of college football, and it’s about time we get recognized for what we are.”
The student went on to say, “We’ve never lost. Sure, we have no wins, but since when is success about achievement? Success means not failing, and that’s something that Emory football has been doing very well for over 100 years. We have a perfect record. Why put that at risk by playing a game? We’re the best team of all time, and we will be for all of time.”
While the BCS could not be reached for comment for this article, it is clear that the committee has no intention of releasing a new set of standings, one in which the Emory Eagles football program would be included. For now, all Emory students can do is wait, and hope that one day, someday, their nonexistent efforts to organize a functioning football team will be recognized.
