USC »

Tripping the Light Sarcastic

Article by Eric Pratt February 26, 2012

The recent Daily Trojan article on sarcasm left me a little out of sorts. “One idiom calls sarcasm the lowest form of wit,” the columnist wrote. Though it’s not a direct attack, I still feel that it’s my duty to hold up some sort of shield to protect sarcasm and USC Basement, where sarcasm brings us... MORE »

Article by Becca Grumet
December 20, 2011

A Jew’s Perspective of Christmas

When I was a kid, my mom took me to see a production of Andrew Lloyd Webber’s Jesus Christ Superstar. After that, I thought I knew absolutely everything there was to know about Jesus. It was easy! The hippie Jews thought he was the shit, sang Hosanna! a bunch of times, and eventually went all... MORE »

Cornell »
Video by smalls
February 23, 2011

Black and Yellow Acoustic Cover

On account of jwoww’s lackluster video posts lately (seriously, you should leave the music to me), I thought I’d throw up this sick cover to Wiz Khalifa’ MORE »

Article by Max Lehman
November 30, 2011

Hofstra Scrats

     There is a dark beast running free somewhere among the Hofstra campus. Its strength is in its numbers. Its deformity is in its cute ugly face riddle with whiskers and lifeless, black eyes. It has been around as long as Hofstra has beens a university, perhaps longer. It plays with yarn, and gets fur... MORE »

Picture by Anonymous
October 5, 2010

Who Made A Cardboard Cut-Out of the Can Fairy?

The can fairy doesn’t recycle! He brings those cans in for cold hard cash! MORE »

Article by shepbb
March 31, 2012

Have Decreasing Admission Rates Gone Too Far?

Last Thursday, Cornell released its decisions for its regular admission applicants. The 6,123 students were drawn from an applicant pool of 37,812. According to a person who owns a calculator, this means that the 2012 Cornell Acceptance Rate for 2012 is about 16.2 percent.   You might be thinking that’s really selective. But, how selective... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by Kygrm22
February 15, 2012

The Ramapo College Student Handbook

1) If you attempt to download illegally, some guy named Cisco will come to your apartment and cut off all of your fingers. 2) No parking allowed on campus. Parking is available at the Ramapo Reservation. Failing to abide will lead to tire boots. 3) If you are blind, you are still not allowed to... MORE »

Article by Piliour
November 3, 2010

National Anthem Amended in Carrier Dome

  As a result of perseverance and an overwhelming desire to be annoying, basketball game-attendees have coaxed the University into altering the “Star Spangled Banner” before a game begins; the anthem will now include a pause, wherein fans may form an “O” with their arms and yell, “OHHHHHH!” at the tops of their lungs during... MORE »

Article by Rud
December 27, 2010

Man Makes New Years Resolution to Attend Class More; Discovers He’s 43 Years Old

Local Syracuse man, Ted Genuario decided to please his parents this upcoming Spring semester by attending more classes to improve his GPA. “Yeah, they like were like if you get a 3.0 next semester we’ll get you Bangles tickets for the Summer, so I was like fuck yeah The Bangles! I didn’t study though, because... MORE »

Article by Lia Woodward
February 26, 2012

Week in Review: The apple doesn’t fall far from the News!

Your second-best source for the past week’s Daily Trojan Headlines. Office of College Advising tells students to hold off on grad school In the same way that somewhere, a well-meaning high schooler is telling her ugly best friend to hold off on that love confession she’s been planning for a hot guy that has never... MORE »