The Dining Hall: A Narrative

Article by Piliour August 31, 2011

It’s a Wednesday night. My stomach rumbles like that random earthquake that somehow spread from Virginia to Australia. I try to silence it with a snack, perhaps a processed potato covered in cheese and served in a red bag will quench my palate. No such luck. The trek begins. I arrive at the dining hall.... MORE »

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Picture by apost
September 13, 2011

Grammar Police Strike Again

Cornell is not like MIT. Our custodial stuff is not hiding a secret math genius, but our students do recognize that they are the chosen ones and can and will make it known. MORE »

Article by loganor
February 16, 2012

Shit to Read Whilst Shitting: A Series

So you’re sitting on the crapper. You’re trying to squeeze out all those Valentine’s Day candies you inhaled while watching BOTH Bridget Jones’ movies. You need a distraction. What better distraction than tales from the hood?  Rappers have enticed us for years with stories of “going hard on a ho” and “sticky green” and “bling”.... MORE »

Article by Kevin Slack
March 23, 2011

Newhouse Renames Courses Again Using Klingon, Heiroglyphs, Random Nouns

In an effort to pretend that Newhouse is keeping up with the rapidly changing media landscape, the former communications school giant announced the third overhaul of its curriculum in the past three years. The changes, announced in a press conference held Tuesday, were described by spokesman Ron Harris as “really we’re just giving all our... MORE »

Article by Anonymous
December 7, 2010

Some Super College Candy Weekly Links For Ya

The Weekly Ten: This Semester Needs to End From doing anything to avoid finishing your homework to Facebook countdown statuses… http://collegecandy.com/2010/12/06/the-weekly-ten-this-semester-needs-to-end/ What The Time You’re Turning In Says About Your Night Just dont be the guy/girl who comes back home at 8 am the next day.http://collegecandy.com/2010/12/04/what-the-time-youre-turning-in-says-about-your-night/Friday Faves: The 6 Stages of Getting Drunk Sober to Hungover!http://collegecandy.com/2010/12/03/81379/ MORE »

Article by apost
February 7, 2011

​Opposition’s Goalie Gets Offended

It has been a longstanding tradition at Big Red hockey games to chant, after a goal is scored for Cornell, ‘it’s all your fault’ while pointing in the direction of the other team’s goalie. Additionally whenever they take off their mask the crowd chants, ‘ugly’ until he puts his mask back on. My mom always... MORE »

Article by Alex Rosenthal
January 13, 2012

THE TIM TEBOW ARTICLE

THE TIM TEBOW ARTICLE THIS IS AN ARTICLE ABOUT TIM TEBOW. THAT’S WHY YOU CLICKED ON IT AND YOU’RE READING IT RIGHT NOW. JUST BECAUSE IT’S ABOUT TIM TEBOW. AND YOU LOVE OR HATE TIM TEBOW. TIM TEBOW IS A QUARTERBACK ON THE DENVER BRONCOS. TIM TEBOW IS REALLY GOOD AT FOOTBALL. TEBOW TEBOW TEBOW.... MORE »