Cain drops out of GOP race, is seen at local bar

Picture by Chris Varney December 7, 2011

Herman Cain is implementing his revised 9-9-9 plan: “9 beers, 9 shots, 9 beers!” MORE »

Article by emcorbet
March 8, 2011

Budget cuts force university students to devise get-rich-quick schemes

No Pell Grants, few scholarships, and limited loan activity. Campusbasement has already presented you with the 5 steps to getting financial aid but despite those steps, recent budget cuts are costing students their body parts to pay for school.  “I don’t know how I am going to pay for school anymore,” says USC junior Clyde... MORE »

Article by Piliour
March 24, 2011

Report: You Will Never Get a Job

It’s almost April, meaning that many students will be graduating in a mere month, attempting to enter the real world filled with real 7:00 wake-ups, real coffee breaks and real sexual harassment lawsuits. Unfortunately, you will never get to experience the joys of hearing that “Not Guilty” verdict because, according to a recent study, you... MORE »

Picture by Anonymous
October 19, 2010

Go Cuse!

Tops.. or for us old schoolers P&C MORE »

Article by Alfred
October 13, 2012

Student Still Waiting For Nas

After the major disappointment by Nas’s no-show at the One World concert, most students left, cursing the Hip Hop legend from Queensbridge. Most. Meet Jeffrey Turs, a junior attending Syracuse University who claims to be Nas’s biggest fan and firmly believes that the rapper will appear at the Carrier Dome. “This isn’t the first time... MORE »

Article by Kevin Slack
December 1, 2010

Newly-Single Freshman Loses Confidence in Record Thirty Seconds

Sam Harper is feeling good. He’s free. Two days ago, he announced to the press and the Facebook community that he had broken up with his high school girlfriend of two years, Kristen Shaw. Now Harper, sans-girlfriend, is “out on the prowl again,” as he characterizes it. “It just had to happen, man,” He tells... MORE »

Article by Michael Sullivan
February 2, 2011

Your roommate is casually better than you

Good morning, sleepyhead. Did it feel nice waking up at 2 p.m. because you don’t have any Wednesday classes? It sure must’ve been. But don’t ask your roommate, because he was up at 5 to squeeze in his daily cardio regimen before his 8 a.m. Multivariable Calculus class. He has no idea what it’s like... MORE »