Bitchin’ Music Thursday – 12.02.10 – Noel Gallagher Live!

Article by Sheldon J December 2, 2010

Well good evening! Ive missed you! Heres whats happened since we last spoke:Im now a Campus Basement Staff member!!!! woooo!! so thanks for that okay so now that its like snowy and cold, this is usually the time of year where i put on really chunky scarves throw snow at cars, break into golf courses... MORE »

Article by drewthegoose
September 28, 2012

ESPN’s Mel Kiper Jr. Sues Mitt Romney for Hairstyle Copyright Infringement

Mel Kiper Jr. filed suit against Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney Friday for hairstyle copyright infringement. Kiper, the senior NFL draft analyst for ESPN, held a press conference at 8 a.m. Friday to announce his lawsuit. Kiper claimed that Romney’s hairstyle was a blatant copycat of his “legendary locks.” “After looking at several hours of... MORE »

Article by Roy Parker
November 4, 2011

An Urgent Plea for You to Read

Dear Reader,   I don’t think you understand how important it is that you’re reading this article. For at this very moment, you are in fact saving lives. Whose lives? Our lives. The lives of us trapped down here in this basement forced to write articles for your amusement.   Are you confused? Let me... MORE »

Article by Paul J
April 7, 2011

Area Squirrel Whisperer Pretty Damn Tired Of Being Asked For Nuts, Snacks All The Time

When student Alex Jarvis first noticed her special ability to communicate with the squirrels at USC, she thought that by using their vast network of knowledge of goings on about campus, she would be able to help those in need. Instead, the little bastards constantly ask her for food or whatever she has in her... MORE »

Picture by Anonymous
September 6, 2010

Old School SU Cheerleader

Check out for awesome old pictures of SU. I’m talking 1918 old! MORE »

Article by Mitch Finnegan
September 19, 2012

Odd Future concert draws masses of white hipsters

Downtown Columbia still smells faintly of smugness and body odor today from the hundreds of Caucasian hipsters who congregated at the Blue Note last night for the Odd Future Wolf Gang Kill Them All (OFWGKTA) concert. OFWGKTA is a rap collective out of Los Angeles, CA. with seemingly over a million members. Among them are... MORE »

Article by apost
October 5, 2010

Umbrella Etiquette

It is always raining here in Ithaca and so it is pertinent to explain the ten rules/proper etiquette when holding an open umbrella around campus. 1. If you are tall do NOT tilt your umbrella downward because you will get me wet. 2. If you are short (and I apologize if I ever did this... MORE »

Video by loganor
December 11, 2011

A Fortnight of my Weird-Ass Christmas Playlist Pt. 2

Here’s another one. You might remember these guys as the ones who sang that song that had a lot of fast singing and then “chickity china, the chinese chicken”. They also sang about the birth of Christ. Who knew? MORE »