CURRENTLY KICKIN' ASS

Syracuse student claims to be Hannah Montana

Video by Annie Segal March 31, 2013

Sophomore PR major, Hannah Melton, claims to be the real Hannah Montana after getting her wisdom teeth removed. Has the real Hannah Montana been walking among us at Syracuse? MORE »

Article by jpramuk
March 9, 2013

Boeheim Shits on Podium After Georgetown Loss

Syracuse head coach Jim Boeheim walked to the postgame press conference podium after his reeling team’s 61-39 embarrassment at No. 5 Georgetown Saturday, undid his pants, dropped a steaming, rancid turd just below the microphone, and walked out.   “You want an opening statement?” An irate Boeheim asked as he undid his belt. “Here’s my... MORE »

Article by Alfred
February 11, 2013

Pope resigns, realizes there is no God after hearing Pauly D will be playing at Syracuse University

Catholics around the world were shocked to hear that Pope Benedict XVI had resigned from his position as “THE CLOSEST PERSON TO GOD ON EARTH.” He tells sources at Campus Basement that the departure comes from fatigue, old age, and University Union’s Winter Carnival line-up. “They were hyping the students up, saying, ‘oh get ready,... MORE »

Article by Annie Segal
January 31, 2013

30 Rock and other shows insult Syracuse, must be destroyed

Tina Fey’s long running show, 30 Rock, will be airing its hour-long series finale tonight at 8/7 central on NBC. Let it be known that this was not Fey’s decision to end the show- it was the higher power of Syracuse University. Fey’s character, Liz Lemon, is the head writer of a variety show starring... MORE »

Article by jpramuk
January 24, 2013

Phone Screenshots Officially Confirm Syracuse is Coldest Place Ever

Syracuse University students posted hundreds of smart phone screenshots of the city’s weather to social media in the past three days, officially confirming the city is “literally, like, THE coldest place ever.” The sheer number of screenshots showing temperatures that ranged from -65 degrees Celsius to 10 degrees Fahrenheit alarmed scientists, who quickly confirmed the... MORE »

Article by Alfred
January 18, 2013

The Differences Between Fall and Spring Semester

Welcome back to Syracuse everybody! You may be wondering what’s so different about this semester than the last, so we here at Campus Basement are proud to present our comparative guide to help you transition into the new semester. MORE »

Article by Kevin Cardoni
January 6, 2013

Hockey’s Back! …and there was much rejoicing

I woke up today thinking it would be any regular Sunday: completely naked, my head laying over the side of my bed, desperately trying to avoid the sunrise shining through the pathetic excuse for curtains and onto my face.  But then I saw the news, that glorious and long-awaited news, that the NHL lockout has... MORE »

Video by Kevin Cardoni
December 26, 2012

Hold the Pulp Season Finale – The Christmas Episode

Christmas has come and gone, much to the dismay of just about everyone who isn’t celebrating Kwanzaa today.  But with the passage of Christmas, we look back on the release of Hold the Pulp’s final episode of its second season, with a reasonably Christmas-ish twist.  There are some great segments in this episode, as well... MORE »