here to announce the most exciting news of the holiday season! Many of
you know it  ““ a little hidden gem tucked inside the University Village
known as Dollar Dollar. Perhaps this is where you’ve bought your
kitchenware or a 3 pack of tube socks. Affectionately dubbed “Dollar
by absolutely no one except me, the world’s greatest dollar store that
sells most things for $8.99 has just announced their first annual Black
Friday blowout!!! You’re so crazy lucky that I’m sharing this info!

on the list of super sales: the post Thanksgiving meal just got a
little sweeter. LITERALLY. Because all strange off-brand cookies and
candy including peach rings, sour worms, and weirdly colored licorice
are buy 9 and get the 10th FREE! You better go stock up like, stat.

yet, need a cactus? You’re in luck! I frecking love those things; they
really make any house into a home (minus the whole pointy child hazard
thing). Dollar
2 is
offering cactuses for 99 cents only on Black Friday with the purchase
of a Siamese fighting fish bamboo plant! Decorate your pad with a badass
and a cactus. Sweet deal.

listen, ladies. The Friday deal on under garments might be the best of
all: 10 bras for $1! There’s a wide selection of colors to choose from
including greyish black, off white, bleached denim purple, and greenish
brown! Sizes vary.

Some other great deals in our special sneak preview ad:

“Ten mugs for $1.00!!!! May contain lead/arsenic/aids.”

“Jesus candles ““ $1.00 for a set of 4.”

“Leopard print suitcase, complete with as many packs of chiclets as you can stuff inside ““ $9.99″

best advice I can offer for scoring the best deals at Dollar Dollar on
Friday is to GET THERE EARLY. I’m serious. Don’t be afraid to camp out
in the UV at 4am if need be. It will be totally worth it, even if you’re
mugged (which you will be). If it looks deserted and sketchy, you’re in
the right place!

Happy shopping, USC! I know where I’ll be on Black Friday!!!