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It’s time for the last adderall binge push. One more round of finals season, and my 16 years of taking tests and writing papers will be over. After 16 years of schoolwork – yes I’m including elementary school, because multiplication tables were fucking hard – I should have finals studying down to a science. Honestly,... MORE »
Yesterday, outside Olin Library, Lefties came together to protest against the abundance of righty desks and lack of lefty desks around Cornell’s Campus. With so many famous, successful, lefties, it is disturbing to these students that they are underrepresented. “We used to be persecuted against. There’s a long history of discrimination against our people. My... MORE »
What a difference from last week’s ecstasy coma at DayGlow to this week’s Occupy FairMart. Typical Lehigh. Anyway, good luck finding a seat in any library at this point in the day. I guess if all else fails, sleep on the floor? MORE »
Suck it up readers. This is all I have on my mind. Sorry for being lame. So, my WashU comrades, it is that time of year again. Christmahanakwanzika, you ask? Of course not. Its finals season, baby! Refills on Adderrall prescriptions have been placed. Textbooks have been dusted off. Study rooms have been reserved. Time... MORE »
As finals week progresses Cornell Administrative staff wish all of the students a safe and healthy experience. Walking to Mann today it was difficult NOT to notice the giant blown-up condoms coming out of Warren Hall. Let it be a reminder to us all on this fine day: you’re super horny, but you’re in the... MORE »
Halloween 2011 is on a Monday. Whose idea was that again? Pope Gregory XIII? I do have some good news. In exchange for Halloween 2011 being on a Monday, Halloween 2013 is going to be on a Thursday. Current freshmen and sophomores (and a handful of juniors) can party up 10/31/13 in high (probably, drunk... MORE »
After more than two years of general frustration, Marshall junior Sasha Heinz finally caved in and looked up the word “synergy” on Tuesday. “You know, I’d had enough,” Heinz recalled. “I was studying for one of my finals, another test based on rote memorization of arbitrary terms, when I’d decided I’d had enough.” The final... MORE »