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Article by Kevin Cardoni
October 26, 2012

Halloween Costumes That Suck – And How to Make Them Awesome

Halloween weekend is finally here, and I couldn’t possibly be any more excited than I normally am to dress up like a fool and solicit goodies from strangers.  But not everyone takes this sacred holiday seriously, so here are a few quick examples of costume ideas that you should probably steer clear of for this... MORE »

Article by Jonfen
September 10, 2012

With Parents Away for Weekend, Fraternity Brothers Decide to Throw Party

On Saturday night, brothers of Phi Alpha Mu devised a scheme to throw a house party, while their parents spent the weekend at a resort in Cancun. Despite the parents’ numerous requests to “keep the house clean” and “not open the door for any strangers,” the Phi Alpha Mu brothers admitted over 200 guests into... MORE »

Article by Kevin Cardoni
August 1, 2012

Badminton Suddenly Relevant Amid Olympic Scandal

The 2012 Olympics in London are in full swing.  I know that because absolutely NO ONE will stop talking about every single thing that happens across the pond.  Never in my life could I have imagined that people could possibly be captivated by archery or left breathless by a gymnast’s floor routine.  Apparently, it’s all... MORE »

Article by Alex Rosenthal
July 9, 2012

Upbeat Pop Song About Partying is a Huge Hit With Young People

BREAKING: A song centralized around partying, drinking alcoholic beverages, and generally having a good time has proven to be a massive chart-topping pop hit this week. The catchy tune was written and sung by a popular artist who has already had at least one or two Top 40 hits covering similar subject matter. The new... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 26, 2012

Skorton and Bloomberg to Host Party at Level B

With convocation finished, and students off with their families and friends enjoying the moment, it’s time for the big guys to have fun. Tonight, at Level B, President David J. Skorton and convocation speaker and New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg will be hosting an invite-only dance party. The party was not supposed to be... MORE »

Article by hmerkt
April 9, 2012

“Expert’s Research” Reveals Key to Guaranteed Hookups

We’ve all had hook ups, (or at least now we’re all in agreement that I’m cool enough to have had them) but recent studies tell us these hookups commence for reasons outside of what conventional wisdom, and common sense, would have us believe. According to research conducted by young men all across the country, being... MORE »

Article by Roy Parker
April 9, 2012

Jesus Misses Easter, Too Hungover

    After 3 straight days of partying, Jesus Christ, 33, awoke yesterday on April 8 to realize something awful – he had missed Easter.   “I literally remember nothing about the past 3 days,” Jesus said to our crack-investigative team. “And then I woke up yesterday with the worst Dad-damn headache I’ve ever had... MORE »

Article by GnarlySkarz
March 23, 2012

Studying “Party Girl” Annoyed With Loud Drunks Outside

Anita Wetcrotch, a junior at Ramapo College, has a physics test tomorrow. You might not know her by name, but you may recognize her from her various roles around campus: The girl who’s sleeping with the baseball team The trashed girl at the party The obnoxious girl screaming outside of your window past 2am The... MORE »