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tagged homeless »
Homeless Man Sleeping Outside Apple Store Presumed To Be In Line For iPhone 5
Local homeless man Garvis Cocktooth recently became something of a media sensation after being crowned by news outlets as “the first person in line for the iPhone 5.” Cocktooth, who has been living on a pile of unfolded Domino’s Pizza boxes outside the Apple Store for the past three years, is completely dumbfounded by his... MORE »
Gertis the Homeless Wheelchair Guy on Marshall Street Is Filthy Rich
Who knew? Gertis, the famour Syracuse homeless guy who sits outside of Starbucks on Marshall Street is actually FILTHY RICH! Hoarding cash? “Hey pretty lady, spare any change?!” Source: https://notorious1419.tumblr.com/ MORE »
Finding Housing in Ithaca Ruins Student’s Lives
The only place where the real estate market never feels the economic troubles of the country is Collegetown, Ithaca NY. I am pretty sure this has something to do with economics…supply and demand I assume. But, don’t quote me on that. There are many issues though that come with the real estate market in Ithaca.... MORE »
Bacon-wrapped ghetto dogs receive 5-star Zagat review
Leonard Zagat, a local homeless man, recently awarded a five-star review to a bacon-wrapped hot dog sold by a local street vendor on Saturday’s game day. The food enthusiast, who sleeps under the Vermont Ave. I-10 on-ramp, said it was “the best godderned piece of shit I’ve licked all week.” Zagat’s review came shortly after... MORE »
Eli The Homeless Guy on Marshall Street Has An Album!
Apparently Eli had time to record a CD just in time for Christmas. Titled “El’s Christmas Mission” the album was recorded in the Belfer Audio Laboratory, at Syracuse University. So, now when Eli comes up to you asking for cash, you can tell him you bought his CD! Check out Empire Life Entertainment to read more MORE »
Week in Review
Like a Frat Kid Loves Cake: The IFC fraternity rush policy was changed to more closely mimic sorority rush. Guides or “rho chis” will now be responsible for escorting potential new members to every house on campus. Similarly, fraternities are now expected to sing and cheer during recruitment, decorate the exteriors of their houses with... MORE »
Insights Incite Spare Change
A few years ago, Syracuse University instituted a new motto: Insights Incite Change. Now, they are under investigation for copyright infringement. It seems that a certain group of individuals claimed this motto long before SU and now it seeks restitution for the wrongful appropriation of the motto. The individuals pressing charges are: bums. Antonio Jones,... MORE »
Eli the homeless guitarist on Marshall Street
eli is my homeboy MORE »