Much to presidential hopeful Rick Santorum’s dismay, California’s 9th Circuit ruled that the infamous Proposition 8, which would ban gay marriage in California, was deemed unconstitutional. In response, Santorum used words like “absurd” and “judicial tyranny.” He also vowed that he would fight to overturn the ruling should he be elected president.

“It’s hard to sleep at night knowing that people are happy,” Santorum said. “It’s very stressful knowing that people I don’t know, nor will I ever see, are carrying out that inappropriate behavior, or what ever it is that gays do.”

This did not sit well with the estimated 4 million gay citizens in the United States.

“Yeah, we’re not voting for that guy,” said every gay person in America. “We loved his tie though. It went great with everything else that sucks about him.”

The groundbreaking ruling could potentially create a ripple effect throughout every state except Texas, where Governor Rick Perry has made his opinion regarding homosexuality well broadcasted. While running for a GOP nomination, Perry starred in his own advertisement, which included his disapproval of gays. In addition to not supporting him, much of America found another reason to believe everybody from Texas is arrogant.

“I think that singling out the gay community is what God wanted me to do,” Perry said.

God declined to comment on these allegations.

In general, much of California is content with the courts ruling. In a progressive 21st century, equality for all has become a key issue and the decision has served as a testament to that belief. The city of San Francisco released this statement shortly after the closing of the court:

Sorry I’m not sorry.