Your second-best source for the past week’s Daily Trojan headlines

New health center should
mean more comprehensive care, more resources :

Norris to screen film
on religion :
Me to stay home and watch Archer

$30 million donated
to build new hall :
It’s great the Dauterives are stepping up, but kind of
annoying we “totally don’t know where” we dropped the Dornsife money.

VP of Student Affairs
Michael L. Jackson discusses love, leadership, spirituality :

Unfortunately, other Michael Jackson still seems to have done this better.

SC’s Career Fest this
week brought speakers to give students career advice :
Popular seminars
included “Stop Crying” and “Seriously, Just Take a Deep Breath”

Obama proposes
financial aid be increased overall, but cut for institutions that can’t control
tuition costs :
For a time machine that could let me go to college whenever
this is true, I’d pay all the money I
! (Approx. -$200,000.)

Study finds less
drinking, less drinking-related problems on campus than off campus
: Off campus housing: A Friendly Place
for Budding Alcoholics

Local nonstudent
residents rally against lost Vermont housing; “this community is being absorbed
like a virus by USC” :
Off campus housing: Your Budding Alcoholism Less Adorable
Than You Think

Community asks for
beautification improvements west of Vermont :
Mainly, get all these budding
alcoholics and their vomit off their lawns

DPS monitors Facebook
to prepare for “controversial” events, allegedly followed a student to a party
Now we all have one more creepy ex-girlfriend to deal with.

SC Pharmacy to launch
web-based application to allow patrons to order prescriptions online :
you want, they’ll even send a dude to stand too closely behind you while you do

Professor Proffitt
stresses creativity, innovation in journalism :
Assuming that includes
making fun of journalism, we take our unspoken congratulations.

Ostrow Dentistry
School launches new identity :
It likes men now, and doesn’t care who

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