- Greet
the card-swiper at the front desk, even though she will NEVER greet you
back, and make your way upstairs - Sprint
through the basketball courts, pretending you don’t see 16 pairs of eyes
glaring at you because your big toe touched the out-of-bounds line on
their court, causing the short Asian kid to miss the layup that he was
never going to make anyway - Approach
the sign-up desk - All
the sign-up sheets for treadmills/bikes/elliptical machines are full, even
though there are 4 people on them - Attempt
to go on a treadmill without signing up - Get
reprimanded by a girl who weighs 68 pounds and clearly hates working at
Archbold - Make
your way to the free weights - Remember
why you hate free weights - Make
your way to the weight machines - Keep
moving right on past the machines because you’re the only guy over there - Oops.
You accidentally wandered over to the basketball court. Pretend you want
to play and shoot for teams. - You
made your shot, but somehow you got fucked over by the guys on the court
and they’re not letting you play in the game. - Sit on
the sideline and wait for the game to finish. - Discover
that they’re all done playing once the game ends. - Head
to Kimmel.
Good workout!
