On Wednesday, the Daily Orange featured an article by Susan Kim stating that SU Showcase, the day that attempted to destroy Mayfest, now requires students to submit a request to participate.

Allow me to clarify this for those of you whose heads have NOT exploded yet. Syracuse University decided a few years ago that Mayfest would no longer be, because it condoned underage drinking and took away from what was supposed to be an educational day. So, the university, despite angry student sentiment, renamed the day “SU Showcase,” to attempt to get students off the New Orleans-esque atmosphere of Euclid Avenue and back onto the campus. But now, it appears, they’re not going to make it easy for us. They want us to apply to partake in their bullshit. Meaning that some of us might get REJECTED from the event that every student is supposed to attend instead of going to Euclid to get drunk.

I don’t know about you, but if I were to get rejected from something as lame as SU Showcase, the first thing I would do was drink my sorrows away. On Euclid. During Mayfest.

Now, I’m not saying you’re a nerd if you apply for a spot in SU Showcase. I’m implying it, pretty heavily, but I’m not coming right out and saying it. In fact, quite frankly, I have no problem with you if you’re doing it. My problem is with the university, who seems to think SU Showcase is some sort of coveted trophy. How could they possibly think that they would get enough submissions that people actually need apply to something that they’re using to PREVENT college students from a beautiful day of beer pong, barbecues, and broing out? It’s almost as if they don’t want us on campus that day.

Still, according to the article in the DO, and I am not making this up, they have already received over 50 submissions. Really? 50 submissions? If I had to guess, I’d say that the list of applicants looks like this:

1. John Smith
2. Bob Smith
3. Billy Smith
4. Billy Bob Smith
5. Some other combination of obviously made up names

And so on until they make up 50 names. Let’s be realistic: there is no need to force people to apply for spots in the showcase. Everyone is going to be on Euclid. Everyone who is not on Euclid is not going to want to be “the guy walking down Euclid with a backpack on during Mayfest.” (Note: backpacks are only OK on Mayfest if they contain beer, beer, and more beer. Hot dogs are also OK.)

Senior Economics major Jeff Kelley said it best: “The only thing I want to showcase on that day is my drunk ass staggering down Euclid looking for another keg.”

Poignantly said. Maybe he should apply for SU Showcase.

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