Article by Dan Kropa
September 6, 2012


With the start of a new semester, there are many questions that pop into students’ minds. Will my classes suck? Are there hot freshmen? Should I go out this Thursday? Well, these questions are easily answered. They’re all yes. But the real issue at hand, the one question we are all waiting for an answer,... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by Jessica Kluge
September 5, 2012

Ramapo Closes Parking Lots, Inadvertently Combats Obesity

With the arrival of a new semester, Ramapo has once again done its best to ensure the frustration of its students. In the most confusing movement since the creation of the Uggs and shorts combo, Public Safety has blocked off all convenient parking lots during move in week.  Hundreds of students are forced to park in the... MORE »

Article by jillboard
September 4, 2012

The Official Ramapo College Drinking Game

“WELCOME BACK PEONS!!” – President Mercer, September 4th, 2012 MAHWAH, NJ – BREAKING: In order to raise morale around campus, President Mercer just emailed the Ramapo Basement staff the Official Drinking Game of Ramapo College. I know, I know, it’s the oxymoron of the century. Obviously this game cannot be played on Ramapo’s campus, as... MORE »

Article by sambo24
May 8, 2012

Special Senior Dinner Ends In Shit Storm

Most folks with a higher education can look back at their final week of college and recall seven days of drunken havoc, poor decisions, questionable morals, and loose women. A Ramapo graduate, however, can look back fondly upon snack time in the alcohol-free tent, finger painting, a police presence, and being quarantined in the Village.... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by J.D.Basement
May 7, 2012

Last Will and Testament; Ramapo College, I Leave to You:

–      The right to have a working hand dryer and a stocked soap dispenser coexist in harmony in the upstairs men’s bathroom by the gym. You’ve done a great job at having one at a time, but in this progressive era, you finally bring these two necessities together at the same time.  ... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by GnarlySkarz
May 4, 2012

Public Safety Go Undercover, Insult our Student Society

This just in- after Public Safety’s Annual Ice Cream Social, the idea of sending undercover officers has surfaced. Maybe it was because they had recently seen 21 Jump Street. Maybe it was because they want to relive the college experience. Students have reported sightings of Public Safety officers, usually clean shaven with “cool hats and... MORE »

Article by jillboard
May 3, 2012

Public Safety On Laurel Lots Ticketing Spree

Mahwah, NJ – Ah, the first week of May: the most glorious time of the year. A time for starving oneself for summer and cramming one’s brain with throw-away knowledge. It’s also a time for taking as much harassment from Public Safety as possible before buying a flamethrower with dark intentions. Even though it’s super easy... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by Kygrm22
May 2, 2012

Village Senior Night adopts Middle School Guidelines

In order to ease graduating senior’s transition of moving back with overbearing parents; Ramapo will enforce additional rules during Monday’s senior night. The rules in place will guarantee that attendees have a sober and shitty evening. Ramapo will employ Mahwah Police Depart to make sure that the Village remains safe. Congregating outside in the village... MORE »

Ramapo »
Article by J.D.Basement
April 30, 2012

Breaking News: Student Actually Takes Survey on Facebook That Girl Needed For Class

Mahwah, NJ- In a bizarre turn of events Monday afternoon, Ramapo senior Mark Spalowitznitskyface sat down and took a survey that he saw on Facebook. Sources indicate that the survey was for Rachel Adams, a junior at Ramapo college, and her Marketing Research class’s final paper. Commenting on the situation, Spalowitznitskyface stated that “she promised it... MORE »

Article by jillboard
April 26, 2012

Dating at Ramapo; The Guys’ Guide

Dating at Ramapo is the trickiest of trades. It’s the epicenter of sexual frustration. Most girls at Ramapo have considered going lesbian to avoid having to hook up with one more Ramabro, but we already discussed that in The Girls’ Guide to dating at Ramapo. Thus, it is only fair to emotionally scar the Ramababes as well.... MORE »