Article by maxmartinez
May 26, 2012

Skorton and Bloomberg to Host Party at Level B

With convocation finished, and students off with their families and friends enjoying the moment, it’s time for the big guys to have fun. Tonight, at Level B, President David J. Skorton and convocation speaker and New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg will be hosting an invite-only dance party. The party was not supposed to be... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 23, 2012

Senior Gets Stuck in Toilet at Catherine St. Block Party

Senior week is a time of enjoying some of the last times you’ll be together with all of your friends. Unfortunately for senior Pep Hamburg, he missed one of the seven days completely. The reason, well, he simply got stuck in the toilet for most of Tuesday afternoon. The incident happened at the Catherine Street... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 21, 2012

Two Professors to Get Married at Nasties

Two professors falling for each other is a common thing in the education system. The work place is often a dating hot-spot even though workers are told not to mingle with one another. After two years of dating, two Cornell biology professors are getting married in July, and they’re doing so at the place where... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 21, 2012

Sophomore Throws Party in Olin Library’s Basement

With finals over and school done until August, Cornell students are excited. For sophomore government major Frankie Howard, excited is an understatement. On Friday, May 18th, Howard allegedly brought his laptop and speakers, along with a Grey Goose bottle, a Red Bull, and a flask filled with whiskey, into the basement of Olin Library and... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 16, 2012

Janet Reno ’60 to Speak on Marijuana Rights Thursday

Former Attorney General of the United States and member of the Cornell class of 1960, Janet Reno is making her way back to Ithaca on Thursday. With the election 6 months away and lots of hot issues at hand, Reno wanted to come back and speak with current students about an issue that has been... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 16, 2012

Cornell Bans Smoking on Campus for Fall 2012

For some people, there’s nothing like taking a quick cigarette break in between a class or during a timeout from an intense study session in the library. Unfortunately, the next time that craving hits you, you’ll have to walk to Collegetown to do it. This morning President David J. Skorton announced that the administration voted... MORE »

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Article by G-Nonymous
May 15, 2012

Cornell University Invaded by Extraterrestrial Lifeforms From Planet Q580 in Quadrant X

With all the rumors of Vinny Guadagnino coming to Cornell being untrue, thousands of Ivy League students were shocked and astounded to find that a satirical news website would provide them with inaccurate information. Lucky for you, Earthlings, a REAL extraordinary sensation has crash-landed in Beebe Lake at approximately 3:28 AM. Broadcasted on every major... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 15, 2012

End of the World? Snow in Ithaca This Summer

From tsunamis to tornadoes to hurricanes to oil spills, Earth has been experiencing its fair share of natural disasters. Maybe the Mayans were in fact right when they said that the world would end this year. Weird things really have been occurring on our planet for quite a while now, but nothing as weird as... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
May 13, 2012 1 Comment

Justin Bieber Not Coming to Cornell, But Guess Who Is?

With all the rumors of Justin Bieber coming to Cornell not being true, many girls on campus were heartbroken and disappointed that they wouldn’t get their chance with the teenage heartthrob. Lucky for you, ladies, another sensation is making his way to Ithaca this coming fall. Announced on his Facebook fan page this morning, Jersey... MORE »

Article by maxmartinez
April 30, 2012

Taio Cruz to Bring Rebecca Black to Slope Day

Last night on his Twitter, singer Taio Cruz announced that he is bringing a special guest to his Slope Day Performance on Friday. “Cornell!! im bringin my special boo rebecca black to slope day!! we guna get down this friday, friday, friday!” So get your middle school friends, make sure you have your cereal, don’t... MORE »