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UCLA Football Team Sleeps Through Second Half of Saturday’s USC-UCLA Game
This Saturday, USC defeated long-time rival UCLA 28 to 14 in their annual football matchup; however, the UCLA football team wasn’t around to see their embarrassing defeat. The team spent the second half of the game sleeping in the locker rooms at the Rose Bowl. According to offensive coordinator Norm Chow, the team decided to... MORE »
Syracuse is Playing in the Pinstripe Bowl!
No, seriously! Syracuse is playing in the Pinstripe Bowl! After countless losing seasons, the Orange are bowl-bound. Huzzah! On Thursday, December 30, ‘Cuse will take on a Big 12 team in their first bowl game since 2004. So, when I said earlier (two sentences ago) that there had been “countless” losing seasons, I actually meant... MORE »
Rival School Claims to Have Better Athletics Team Than Your School
At Saturday’s sports outing, many of you were too consumed by the events transpiring on the field/court (or quidditch pitch) to notice that students from your rival school, the most hated of all schools, claimed that your school, in fact, “sucks big, hairy dick,” and that their school, despite losing the game, “could beat your... MORE »
University of Southern Miss Tries to Retire Brett Favre’s Jersey, Fails
From 1987-1991, Brett Favre was enrolled in the University of Southern Mississippi. While enrolled, he set several school records, including most completions, most total yards, and most touchdowns. On Saturday, the University of Southern Mississippi decided to honor Favre, despite the on-goings in his personal life, by retiring his number four jersey. “We wanted to... MORE »
Move Over Fantasy Football, Here’s Your Fantasy Beer Pong Draft Guide
Fantasy football, smantasy shmootball. With the NFL season just about halfway over, many fantasy footballers are out of their league’s playoff race and are looking for a new outlet. I’m here to tell you that Fantasy Beer Pong (FBP) is sweeping the nation more than Swiffer Wet Jet ever could. This is the new craze... MORE »
Syracuse Football Exacts Revenge on CuseMyCampus, Class of 2010
Gone are our days of joking about the Syracuse football team. Why? Because they conned me out of $25. Two Saturdays ago, during Homecoming, I galloped to the Dome, excited to be back at “Cuse and, more importantly, to finally see a good Orange football team. However, the Orange had other plans, and just like... MORE »
Syracuse Football Hurts, Doug Marrone Can Help
Where does Syracuse football hurt? Everywhere. Who does Syracuse football hurt? Everyone. Dougmarrone can help. Credit: smkeeley MORE »
Otto Eats Cheerleader
Saturday’s football game wasn’t a total loss, at least not for Otto, the Syracuse mascot. Just after halftime of the game, Otto, in a football rage common to the SU community, decided to consume one of the cheerleaders, Becky Johnston. “Normally, Otto does that funny thing,” said Cheer Captain Hillary Denver, ever so poignantly, “you... MORE »