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Report: Film students don’t know what ‘meta’ actually means
A recent study conducted by the Committee of People Who Hate Douchebag Film Majors (But Not All Film Majors, Just the Douchebag Ones) revealed that the committee needs to change its name. It’s too long. That same study also revealed an even more revealing revelation: a whopping 99% of film majors use the term “meta”... MORE »
Penises everwhere
more peepees on campus MORE »
New Year’s Resolutions: Week 1 Progress Reports
The new year started with a bang. Literally. As the ball tea-bagged the mouth of times square, most of us began the mission of the year. It wasn’t to stay awake until the end of the party (which may have been a mission for some), it was the start of our New Year’s Resolutions. For... MORE »
Poll Results | What is the best reason you can think of for the football team’s fluke on Saturday?
What is the best reason you can think of for the football team’s fluke on Saturday? MORE »
Rumored Four Loko Ban Has Thousands of Students Preparing for Minor Apocalypse
Four Loko, the popular alcoholic energy drink and currently the second best-selling beverage on the market behind water, is rumored to be facing legal troubles from the Food and Drug Administration for causing too many of its customers to get absolutely blackout retarded and have like, legit no freakin’ memory of what happened last night,... MORE »
Ron Paul Watches V for Vendetta, Seeks to Abolish Executive Branch
When a major politician seeks the legalization of marijuana, it speaks volumes to the millions of advocates nationwide. Millions more jump on board when a presidential nominee promises to eliminate all military engagements brought about in the last decade. For Ron Paul, this appeal to the masses has proven successful in the Iowa and New... MORE »
Marist Officials: “What SAT?:
Last week, Marist officials announced that the SAT, one of the most grueling tests to ever grace a high school student, will no longer be relevant with regard to Marist’s admissions process. Many current Marist students, who had to study for weeks to get a score proficient enough to be admitted to Marist College,... MORE »
Status Updates from the Airplane Home
with contributions by Quyen C Nguyen Le! I got pretty bored on my way home to Florida this winter break. So I decided to let you all in on my experience. Happy holidays! MORE »