◄

►

Wagner football looking a lot like Cornell football

Video by db

October 3, 2011 at 12:15 pm

I bet I’m not the only one surprised it wasn’t a Cornell kid running backwards

SEE MORE » 21, blockedpunt, punt, runningbackwards, wagner, wildblockedpunt

◄ Video of Teacher stopping fight and laying down a verbal smackdown!

An Open Letter to Victoria’s Secret ►

February 6, 2012

BREAKING NEWS: Cornell Working to Hire Victor Cruz as Salsa 101 Instructor

Everyone at Cornell (except transfers…how come they get away with this?) has to take two gym classes and a swim test before they are able to graduate. For some reason it is important that we have both academic knowledge and have 6 credits worth of some physical activity knowledge. We are a well rounded university!... MORE »

February 2, 2012

Giants v. Patriots: Keys to the Game

Giants -I hear Peyton Manning’s recovered. Get him to play quarterback. Eli’s jersey doesn’t specify which Manning needs to play. -Remind Ahmad Bradshaw that even though he plays for the Giants, the other team will be the same size. -Try the Fumblerooski. This will pay out tremendously. For me. I made a certain, little bet... MORE »

January 26, 2012

Report: New York Jets Fans Hope Super Bowl XLVI Goes Something Like 1:18-1:30 of This Video

A group of disgruntled Jets fans can also be seen storming the field at 1:04-1:08. MORE »

January 25, 2012

The Giants v. The 49ers: From a Guy Who Doesn’t Know About Sports

So you’re probably thinking, why don’t I know anything about sports? I am a guy and I want to join a frat. Not the typical stereotype now, am I? Yeah, breaking barriers! Anyway, I played sports when I was a kid. Standard, Little League and soccer where everyone runs around chasing the ball and there... MORE »

December 18, 2011

Cornell Economists Determine Jesus Christ’s Patronage of Tim Tebow to be â€œInefficientâ€ and â€œNot conducive to solving legitimate world problems.”

Ithaca NY””Economists working in Cornell’s Policy Analysis Lab have recently discovered several flaws in Jesus Christ’s social policies. The economists, studying everything from theological infrastructures to econometrics, published a journal article last Monday noting discrepancies between Jesus Christ’s “plans for all creatures on earth” and football. The team learned that Jesus invested too much of... MORE »

October 12, 2011

Who You Gonna Call? BILL MURRAY!

Over Fall Break Cornell is a ghost town. The only people on campus are athletes and townies. The Cornell Big Red Marching Band desperate for some attention called on the only man they knew would answer their call….Bill Murray? Apparently Billy Murray is still there to answer the Ghostbusters’ hot line. Check out the SNL... MORE »

September 20, 2010

Cornell Football Sucks

Last year I went to one Cornell home football game. It was homecoming so I don’t remember much, but what I do remember was that the cheerleaders were far more entertaining. I left the game after what I would say was probably five or ten minutes right about the time when the opposing team, Fordham... MORE »

November 4, 2010

Weezy is Freed; White Girls Everywhere Rejoice

White sorority girls across campus are celebrating Dwayne Carter Jr, AKA Lil Wayne’s release from Riker’s Island jail this morning. At around 9 am on November 4th, Weezy was freed after serving eight months of a one year gun sentence (not sure what happened to those other four months), during which he mysteriously released an... MORE »

March 19, 2012

Student Suspended For Attending Too Many Classes

Do you often feel overwhelmed because you are taking too many credits? Do you just go to other classes to just acquire more knowledge? No, I’m pretty sure you and I both don’t. That isn’t the case with junior Megan Kim of the engineering school, who was suspended from Cornell for attending too many classes... MORE »

December 13, 2010

Which Of These Shitters Is The Shittiest? Poll Results

Apparently Willard Straight Hall sucks! MORE »

March 3, 2012

Drew Carey Isn’t Funny Enough For Campus Basement

Are you? MORE »

November 16, 2011

Cornell Hillel Presents: The Big Red Bris

In an effort to uphold everlasting Jewish traditions, Cornell Hillel hosted a Big Red Bar Mitzvah in Duffield Hall this past weekend. The goal of the event was to provide the opportunity for students, who had not previously held the sacred ceremony, to become Bar or Bat Mitzvot. But Hillel did not stop there. Yesterday... MORE »

October 15, 2011

Steve Jobs Hacks Blackberry Network… From His Grave

Outraged customers and a tarnished brand are the result of a worldwide Blackberry Blackout, which left Blackberry users without email, BBM, or sanity. The problems curiously occurred at the same time as Apple’s release of the iPhone 4S. After an investigation by Research In Motion, the developer of blackberry phones, it appears... MORE »

September 24, 2011

ILR Study: Campus Bar Will Raise GPA’s

Ah, yet another story about the positive effects of alcohol. With an on-campus bar set to open in the Ivy Room this spring, the Cornell Pub Committee wants to pick business hours that will be most beneficial to students. A sample of undergraduate ILRies were tested to see if consuming alcohol before class provides... MORE »

Avicii to Appear at Pixel After Cornell Concert

Cornell to Complicate Financial Aid Process

Can YOU Dance Like the Cookie Man Can?

Girl Neglects to Realize Halloween Is Just an Excuse to Dress Slutty

Illegal Recruitment: Lasker Foundation Rescinds Heimlich's Award

Concert Commission takes over and ousts Slope Day

Drew Carey Isn't Funny Enough For Campus Basement

Transfer Pride: I used to go to Maryland

Wagner football looking a lot like Cornell football

Campus Basement Newsletter!

It's #Follow THURSDAY

Partners