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Article by emcorbet
February 8, 2011

The 5 Steps to Receiving Financial Aid from Your University

Given the yearly tuition increases at colleges nationwide, paying for education is no small feat. That’s why we’ve created this handy list of ways in which you can increase your likelihood of receiving more financial aid! Step 1) Add an ethnic-sounding suffix to your last name Fact: Names ending with “-onzalez” or “-chu”  statistically receive more scholarships and grants... MORE »

Article by Kevin Slack
August 26, 2010

Guide to Dorm Life: Posters Part II

It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for–the exciting conclusion to our Top Ten Most Annoying and Over-Used Dorm Posters ever. We pick up where we left off with a perennial favorite: 5. Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffany’s While James Dean from Part I of our series is more of a unisex poster…Holly Golightly... MORE »

Article by emcorbet
August 26, 2010

Guide to Freshman Orientation Events

Welcome to the incoming class! Behold Syracuse University, the land of the shitty-weather and home of an even shittier football team. Make campus your oasis, and before classes start, hit up the orientation events that our precious tuition money is paying for. (Seriously, attend them. I’m paying $50,000 for you to get free food in... MORE »

Article by Piliour
August 25, 2010

Guide to Dorm Life: How to Make Friends

Ok, so you’re in your dorm. You’ve met your roommate, and you’ve decided one of three things: 1) this is going to be my best friend for life, 2) I could see hanging out with him/her a few times, or 3) I am going to suffocate this person with my pillow as soon as my... MORE »

Article by Kevin Slack
August 25, 2010

Guide to Dorm Life: Posters

So you’ve finally arrived at college, and everything is unpacked, your parents are out the door, and you’re free. Time to spread those little wings and bloom into a beautiful independent-contributing-to-society-citizen-butterfly. Feels good, right?     That’s because you’re drunk already. Welcome to the good life.     There’s just one problem: your jail cell eggshell white... MORE »

Article by Ice Queen
May 5, 2010

An Undecided’s Guide for Choosing a Major

Major Insights: this is the ultimate abridged guide to choosing a major at Syracuse University. Please take the imparted wisdom with a grain of salt, a lemon and a shot of tequila. Philosophy: Do you want to be a philosopher when you grow up? Then this is definitely, definitely the major for you. Because the... MORE »

Picture by Anonymous
April 12, 2010

How To: 5 Ways To Avoid a “Drinking in Public” Ticket

Due to the increase in tickets DPS will be handing out, we created a guide to save your dumbass. MORE »

Article by Piliour
March 29, 2010

How to Make Your Class Schedule

Rule 1: Do not take anything offered before 11 AM. The odds of you learning anything before that hour are fantastically low. Rule 2: Do not take anything offered after 5 PM. The odds of you giving a shit after that hour are almost as low as the odds of learning before 11 AM. Rule... MORE »

Article by Piliour
March 23, 2010

How to Print an Assignment On Campus Before Class

1. Enter your username and password 2. Restart the computer after it freezes midway through typing your password 3. Move to a different computer after the previous one refuses to finish restarting 4. Open internet explorer 19 times because you’re not sure if it understood that you clicked the icon the previous 18 times 5.... MORE »