tagged freshmen »

Article by Piliour
September 6, 2010

Freshman Girl to Parents: “Go Home Already!”

  Standing just outside the Schine Student Center, freshman Bridget Chu had had enough. Enough of the questions. Enough of the concern. Enough of her parents. Her voice echoed all the way through the quad as, at the top of her lungs, she shouted, “Would you leave already?!”   Shoutatus is a typical disease of... MORE »

Article by Piliour
August 31, 2010

Freshmen Inspire New Class: Camping 101

In keeping with an ever-growing acceptance rate and a lack of housing at Syracuse University, Chancellor Nancy Cantor announced Wednesday that SU will introduce a new class for the Fall 2010 semester called Introduction to Camping and the Outdoors. “We figured we could capitalize on a situation that is, quite frankly, less than optimal for... MORE »

Article by Ian Smith
August 31, 2010

In an Astonishing Turn of Events, Freshmen Begin Verbally Assaulting Upperclassmen

The individuals that make up the 2014 batch of Syracuse University freshmen are apparently quick on their feet and unyielding with their tongues. Dozens of SU upperclassmen filed hazing reports to the Department of Campus Safety on Sunday, claiming that several fresh-faced Orangeboys and Orangeladies verbally accosted them as they walked by dorm rooms on... MORE »

Article by Piliour
August 30, 2010

5 Things to Do Freshman Year

1.    Go to Armory Square/Westcott Street ““ Hey! Guess what! There’s more to the Syracuse community than the shitty dorm food you’re force-fed every day. Explore a little bit. Dorian’s, Alto Cinco, Pastabilities, Dinosaur, and many other places serve food that hasn’t been seasoned with Exlax and leftover chicken from Veteran’s Day. Your best bet... MORE »

Article by Piliour
August 30, 2010

Your Best Friend Has Already Forgotten You

You know how, when you were leaving and you and your friend were bawling in your white and blue room, he* said, “I’ll never forget you, man.” Well, he was lying. He already forgot you. What about how, on the drive to Syracuse, he called just to talk about how you guys were going to... MORE »

Picture by Anonymous
August 27, 2010

Class of 2014!

Yeah… we’re pretty much awesome MORE »

Article by eeeeeeeee2
August 26, 2010

Guide to Freshman Orientation Events

Welcome to the incoming class! Behold Syracuse University, the land of the shitty-weather and home of an even shittier football team. Make campus your oasis, and before classes start, hit up the orientation events that our precious tuition money is paying for. (Seriously, attend them. I’m paying $50,000 for you to get free food in... MORE »

Article by Piliour
August 24, 2010

Goon Squad: Friend or Foe?

For those of you who are freshmen, embarking upon this journey called college and moving into your dorms tomorrow and Thursday, you are going to arrive to a strange land. A land where people approach you as soon as you pull in, and demand that you give them your stuff. I’m talking, of course, about... MORE »