Dear Cornell,

Thank you.


Graduating seniors and recent alums

Yes, we thank you for all the hard work you have put in, to
make us want to leave your campus, and be okay with the fact that our jobs are
so competitive and demanding that we are unable to make the trip to come visit.

Not only are you building another campus in the Cornell Alumni hub of the world, but you have also murdered Greek Life and hid it under your
little brother’s bunk bed in hopes we wouldn’t figure it out. But, we have. You
made us smart, Ezra.

You donated $3.5M to the hotel school library. Hotel School
Library is an oxymoron!

You closed JOs, but I guess that came with the death of
Greek life. You can’t have one without the other.

You turned Level B from a sanctuary for the gay community at
Cornell to the “New JOs.” I thought that we prided ourselves in being a
university that supported the gay community? Not took over its cool bar with video games
and turned it into a wanna-be Manhattan club with a photographer. Where is
the love Cornell? Where?


And then Dinos. Dinos was great. Near the end they started
to sell food. I wouldn’t eat it because who knows what was living in their
kitchen, but still”¦.the desperation was evident.

And now my fellow seniors and alumnuses (alumn, alumni, alumnae? I dropped out of Latin in HS), NOW YOU FORCE OUT THE

The only bars left are Level B, Dunbars and Rulloffs. Good luck fitting everyone over the age of 21 and with a fake ID at Cornell into 3 bars. I for one will not miss it.

It is a disgrace, but you’re making our lives that much
easier, so again I must thank you. I must thank you for getting rid of the only
bar that was left for seniors only. A place where people can smoke weed and
cigarettes on the dance floor and no one notices because the place has such a
strong smell of sweat and regret. A place where dancing on tables is not looked upon as slutty, but a way to have your singing voice heard!  A place where you can
drink for 15 more minutes than ANY OTHER BAR IN ITHACA and still be eating CTB
or CTP by 1:30 and in bed by 2.

Thank you for making graduating from this place that much
easier. I won’t miss the work, and now I won’t miss the fun”¦.because whatever
was left of it is now gone.

*I did not forget Green Café. Green Café was also forced to
shut down, but that was because they were disgusting. They still have their
salad bar and candy stand open if you were wondering. That’s how unsanitary
that place was.

SEE MORE » , , ,