CLARKS SUMMIT, PA”” A small Pennsylvania town came out of a recession yesterday when a bus carrying fifty-two SU students made a surprise pit stop at the towns local Wendy’s franchise.
The students were returning from a class trip at New York’s Metropolitan Museum of Art when driver, John Healy of Dewitt, NY, requested for a pit stop. “I had “bout seven whiskey sours over at McSorelys Ale House so by the time we got on the road I was about ready to burst!”
Upon arriving at the restaurant forty-one students ordered a whopping $234.92 worth of fast food. Clarks Summit mayor Sherman Herville got word of the event and made a late-night appearance at the restaurant and conducted an impromptu speech for the patrons. “Tonight! It comes with great pleasure to announce that we have finally bounced back from our economic recession!”
Local patrons of the Wendy’s like Annie Mae Fowler were enthralled to see new money finally stimulating this small economy. “This is so exciting! Last time the town saw this much money was when Mr. Wilkins bought two-hundred pounds worth of grain for his cattle.”
Reports claim that Healy is making plans to sign a deal with the Wendy’s to exclusively make pit stops in Clarks Summit when the bus travels to and from New York City. Mayor Herville said, “Pit-stops are a huge source of income in this town so it’s a good investment.” Adding that, “With this deal we’re going to have the upper hand in the pit stop industry and ensure an economically feasible future for this town.”
Healy did admit that he was hesitant to pick Wendy’s for his pit stop partnership.” I don’t really like Wendy’s for the fact that they have those square burgers,” said Healy. “It’s not for me”¦”
“Right now I’m looking at offers from the McDonalds in Bakersfield and a Sonic in Chenango, NY,” said Healy. “But right now, I’m just gonna keep my options open.”