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Flowchart: Should I Go To Class?
1. On every essay exam, write 4 different ‘options’ as answers. On multiple choice exams, write long descriptions of your answer in the margins. Tell her you just don’t ‘get’ testing. 2. No matter what the subject matter is, whenever a question is asked in class, always relate your answer to Harry Potter. Hitler—>Voldemort. Jesus—>Harry.... MORE »
SANTA MONICA, CA – When Christian Boliviar was getting ready for the Syracuse University in Hollywood semester, he was excited for a lot of things. But one thing stood out above all the rest: “Frank Goldman was teaching us, how couldn’t you be excited? He’s a big shot. Yeah, practically no one our age has... MORE »
It was reported today that after this semester, Syracuse University will no longer carry “hard science” courses, opting instead to allow students to fulfill the requirement with much softer sciences, such as Earth Science, Astronomy and Pottery. This decision was made after scheduling commenced and the University realized that there were a total of 4... MORE »
Halloween is fast approaching, and junior fashion design major Crystal Shapiro is at a crossroads. In what quite possibly may be the most difficult decision she’ll ever make, she has narrowed down her costume options to two: a slutty nurse, and a slutty police officer. This upcoming weekend is a truly glorious time for college... MORE »
Rule 1: Do not take anything offered before 11 AM. The odds of you learning anything before that hour are fantastically low. Rule 2: Do not take anything offered after 5 PM. The odds of you giving a shit after that hour are almost as low as the odds of learning before 11 AM. Rule... MORE »
Actual: Office hours: 2 pm – 4 pmTranslation: There is not a chance in hell you’re going to come visit me. and if you actually DO need me, it’ll be the one day i’m not in. Actual: Please do not use cellphones or laptops during class as they are a distraction to you and others... MORE »
HPM 422: Wine and Beer Appreciation: The only class youâ??ll ever study for on the weekends MAT 221: Elementary Probability and Statistics: The probability of you ever using this information is, statistically speaking, zero. With a standard deviation of â??who gives a shit?â? CFS 388: Human Sexuality: Ok, so there are two classes youâ??ll study... MORE »
Man on the Moon: Peace-loving students at SU have had a record week with the selection of Damien Marley to support Kid Cudi for Block Party and the upcoming “Day of Peace;” unfortunately, chaos-loving students have countered their tranquil holiday in celebration of Cudi’s performance by declaring Wednesday “Drivin’ Drunk and Doin’ My Thang” day.... MORE »
We got this email today from Chris D. We’re not really sure who the heck it is, but he looks pretty sweet in a Syracuse Santa outfit! PS, this is probably a good time to let you know, anybody can post a sweet picture by clicking contribute on the top of the site MORE »
You guys are so kind! MORE »
As the year draws to a close, we at Syracuse Basement (aka The Artist Formerly Known as CuseMyCampus) just wanted to take a moment to thank all of you out there in the webisphere who take the time to read our jokes. Maybe you do it because you think they’re funny, maybe you do it... MORE »
Lots of cool stuff happened this semester. It just didn’t happen at Syracuse. In any event, here’s what did happen at ‘Cuse. Man v. Food: Adam Richman and the crew of Man v. Food visited Syracuse, NY this semester, eating at everyone’s favorite establishment, Dinosaur Bar-B-Que. Richman, famous for his ability to consume massive quantities of... MORE »
First off we have the sleek and sexy South Campus car shots! Next up, we have the “bus-stop-turned-mario-mushroom” shot. Next up, is the Newhouse III benches… And finally, the wonderful Euclid sidewalk. Which will probably never be shoveled, cause us students are just goddamn lazy. Enjoy the crazy ass weather! A couple of things we... MORE »
Alright there has been some EPIC amounts of snow at Cuse right now. We wanna see the crazy pictures/videos of things you have created. From the giant snow penises on Ackerman to building a house of snow, there is always something awesome being done. Pray for no school tomorrow, so you can go outside and... MORE »
Photo Credit: Alex Pines, Jerk Magazine Jerk Magazine is known for being the racy campus publication. Last year they were censored from the dining halls for a bit! Yikes! This Decembers issue is another gawk-bitch-smut-noise-ridden publication which has already been published online! Their excellent photography team has put together a Sordid Affair, with some sexy... MORE »
Jim Boeheim is Chuck Norris’ role model. It’s true. And to prove it, here are some facts about Jimmy B: 1. Jim Boeheim invented the Internet. 2. Jim Boeheim is a Mac and a PC. 3. Jim Boeheim can get from Marshall Street to Archbold Gymnasium in under 3 minutes. 4. Jim Boeheim can get... MORE »
So we launched at Cornell University a few weeks ago, and they have been putting out some pretty hilarious stuff! Were excited to show you some awesome media straight outta the ‘nell! Jewish American Princess (JAP): A Documentary Video! https://www.bigredmycampus.com/videos.php?id=9 Cornell’s Original Gangsta Video https://www.bigredmycampus.com/videos.php?id=6 Weezy is Freed; White Girls Everywhere Rejoice https://www.bigredmycampus.com/articles.php?id=28 Click here... MORE »
I guess these results make me feel less like a loser. MORE »
Mrs. Potato Head: Who doesn’t have a leprosy fetish? Guys LOVE girls missing a nose here or a mouth there! Not to mention, the Atkins diet was so 2000. Carbs are back in and there’s no reason not to put yourself out to spud with the Toy Story diva. Sexy Dorothy from Wizard of Oz:... MORE »