Many incoming freshmen are told that the Syracuse University quad is a wonderful place to play Frisbee, kick a soccer ball around, or just lounge around in the sun while reading for their English class. However, they are warned of the State University of New York: Environmental Sciences and Forestry quad: no person is allowed walk on the grass of the quad.

SU students understand this as an ESF passion and understanding for all plants and living creatures. Many have never even been to the ESF campus since SU classes are focused off the main quad in buildings such as Carnegie, Link, and Hall of Languages. But upon walking on the ESF quad, a shocking discovery had been found in the past months. ESF students have been seen lounging, playing games, and walking on the grass, leaving many SU officials with furious with questions.

Eric. F. Spina, Vice Chancellor and Provost for Syracuse University met with SUNY ESF officials late last night and into the early morning to have his questions answered. “We are getting to the organic bottom of this situation as to why Syracuse students are told not to walk on the quad while ESF students blatantly disregard all feelings for the blades of grass they lay and stumble upon.” Spina’s questions were met with only one response by ESF President Cornelius B. Murphy Jr. “it’s ours not yours.”

Shannon Long, a junior ESF chemistry student agreed with President Murphy’s reply. “We ESF students have an understanding with SU that we can use any of their facilities, dorms, quad and get to share in their graduation and take their classes but it was never established to be the other way around.” It is true that ESF students are housed in SU dorms and many trickle in to SU designated classes. “Can you imagine,” Long continued, “what our quad would consist of if we allowed SU students there? It would be horrendous. That’s why we tell Syracuse students that they’ll get tackled if they walk across it. It’s ours and only ours”

Nancy Cantor was scheduled to meet with President Murphy today but in an act of protest, walked across the grass of the ESF quad and was subsequently tackled by Murphy himself. The meeting has been postponed until the grass stains have been removed from her orange suit jacket.