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Born on the mean street streets of Omaha, Nebraska, sold crack on the streets, got rich, invested it all in the stock market, lost it all in 2008 and now decided to go back to school. As Three 6 Mafia famously said: "It's hard out here for a Pimp."
February 16, 2012

Why Bits and Bytes Closes On The Weekends

You know what really grinds my gears? That Bits and Bytes, one of the few good dining locations on campus, closes for the weekend. But why is that? For the past couple of days I’ve tossed and turned searching for answers, day dreamed constantly through natural science lectures and snoozed through Tom Jones discussions. Does... MORE »

February 9, 2012

The Five Different Types Of Bored Students You’ll Encounter

We’ve all experienced it: You’re in biology lab, and your professor thinks he’s the next Dane Cook. He keeps laughing, but all you hear is silence. The girl next to you is chewing gum and popping it really loudly. What’s a kid to do? Take notes? Listen? No way, college is for partying, dude. But... MORE »

February 2, 2012

Fat Joe And Rick Ross: Hofstra Sets Guinness World Record

The air that day was palpable, filled with smells of butter, chicken wings and pop tarts. Fat Joe had received the call that morning and rose out of bed with a sudden urgency. It was Hofstra calling”¦his first job in years. “To say I’m excited is an understatement, you know, I’d really like to lean... MORE »

January 26, 2012

Omelet Station Files Chapter 11: Students Set-Up “Occupy Lackmann”

 On Dec. 20th, Maria Rodriguez looked down at her bills and shook her head in awe, “There’s just no way we can stay in business, Lackmann charges us too much money in rent and supplies.” The defeated manager dropped the bill into the puddle of tears that had formed on her desk, ” We’re done, I have to file... MORE »