An individual close to the Chancellor said in an interview Friday that Cantor plans on customizing her Crouse-Hinds office to “better match” her size. This summer, the entire Chancellor’s suite will be gutted and refitted with lower ceilings, shorter doorways, smaller desks and chairs, and even scaled-down versions of Cantor’s favorite artwork.

“We feel that, in order to protect her image and increase safety, it is in Nancy’s best interest to make some changes around here.”

These changes have come about after recent calls to “enhance professionalism,” the individual, who wishes to remain anonymous, said.

Many visitors say Cantor constantly spinning in her chair and swinging her legs back and forth distracts them.

According to one of the claims, the Chancellor wheeled her chair away from her stepping stool after having a vodka and tonic with a member of the Board of Trustees. When Cantor “entered into a state of panic,” the trustee advised the Chancellor to “just jump!” The Chancellor responded with expletives and demanded that he call the fire department. Fortunately, Cantor survived the incident with only minor scrapes and bruises.

Although Cantor would not confirm whether or not the details surrounding this claim are true, she did emphatically declare, “What can I say? I’m just a little girl in a very, very big world.”