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Article by carolineoreilly
February 6, 2013

Top Ten Pop Culture Predictions of 2013

1. Kim Kardashian gives birth on live television, baby Kimye eats its way out of Kim’s uterus Twilight-style. Kris Jenner promptly sells the newborn’s life rights to E!. 2. Anne Hathaway punches Best Actress winner Jessica Chastain at the Oscars: “I SHAVED MY HEAD FOR THIS.” 3. Leonardo DiCaprio decides to move to daytime television... MORE »

Article by hmerkt
February 1, 2013

Student Asks Question To Prove He Doesn’t Need To Do So

As the second week of the semester closes, the material being covered in classes is finally starting to touch outside the realm of common sense. As we roll into week three the girl getting over some weight issues who just got her fake ID will once again be easier than your classes, and all will... MORE »

Article by natkirst
January 8, 2013

Cool College Guy Claims He’s Really Into Sports And Having Sex With Women

Last Thursday night Freshman Doyle Matheson admitted in conversation with a member of the opposite sex that he was “really into sports.” “Ladies love guys that are really into sports,” said Matheson, “which explains why I get it in on the regs.” As evidence of his love of sports, Matheson receives ESPN updates to his... MORE »

Article by carolineoreilly
December 28, 2012

The Story of Syllabus Week

Syllabus Week, known as the “Festival of Natty Lights” to many, will soon be upon us once more. Though widely celebrate by most college students, there are many who have forgotten the true meaning of the weeklong celebration. To remind us why we celebrate Syllabus Week, we have decided to retell the story of how... MORE »

Article by Becca Grumet
November 21, 2012

15 Things I’m Thankful For

Because time moves too quickly in college I’m not really sure what Thanksgiving is about anymore (pilgrims?? Genocide? I dunno), but the one thing I do recall is that people say what they’re thankful for, and so I’ve compiled a list to read out at the dinner table tomorrow: 1. The Mucho Mango smoothie at the SCA... MORE »

October 31, 2012

Overbearing Mother Who Attended Parents’ Weekend Still Refusing to Say Who Gave Her a Hickey at the Tailgate

Monica Del Valle, a 46-year-old bank manager from Baton Rouge, Louisiana, became the object of intense scrutiny this past week after her son Danny, a junior studying Economics, noticed a small, asymmetrical bruise on his mother’s neck as she pulled him away from a keg stand. According to initial reports, the jovial atmosphere was disrupted... MORE »

October 5, 2012

Hookup on the Row Leads to Actual Feelings, Greek Community “Shocked”

He was in a pastel pink tank top and Chinos. She was in a white blouse and black short shorts. His wayfarers were falling off his face. She had someone’s underwear on her head. Separately, they were merely fodder for another night on the Row. Together, however, they presented something revolutionary. “It was shocking,” recounted... MORE »

Article by Jessica Kluge
September 19, 2012

Rainy day? Needs More Water

Ramapo has been doing all it can to ensure a more ‘green’ and economic campus over the past few years.  In an effort to be even more sustainable, the executive board has confirmed its decision to only activate the college’s sprinklers during rainstorms.  Whether it be a light drizzle or torrential monsoon, hundreds of expensive,... MORE »

Article by Kevin Cardoni
August 1, 2012

Badminton Suddenly Relevant Amid Olympic Scandal

The 2012 Olympics in London are in full swing.  I know that because absolutely NO ONE will stop talking about every single thing that happens across the pond.  Never in my life could I have imagined that people could possibly be captivated by archery or left breathless by a gymnast’s floor routine.  Apparently, it’s all... MORE »