tagged mizzou »

Article by carolineoreilly
February 28, 2013

Alpha Sigma Sigma Builds Coat Room, Becomes Top Frat on Campus

In a recent poll conducted by the MU Greek System, Alpha Sigma Sigma, Mizzou’s formerly lowest-ranked fraternity by female students, has recently been rated “Top House on Campus.” Though experts are citing a number of reasons for the rankings upset, female students asked about their sudden change in heart towards the fraternity, nearly all mentioned... MORE »

Article by connorc23
February 20, 2013

PhD Candidates Cite Social Justice FIG as Inspiration

Today, during a press conference that nobody asked for, several doctoral candidates of Sociology and Political Science at the University of Missouri cited the Social Justice Freshmen Interest Group program, or FIG for short, as an inspiration for their further pursuits. The FIG meets once every week for an hour to discuss issues that mostly... MORE »

Article by carolineoreilly
February 6, 2013

Top Ten Pop Culture Predictions of 2013

1. Kim Kardashian gives birth on live television, baby Kimye eats its way out of Kim’s uterus Twilight-style. Kris Jenner promptly sells the newborn’s life rights to E!. 2. Anne Hathaway punches Best Actress winner Jessica Chastain at the Oscars: “I SHAVED MY HEAD FOR THIS.” 3. Leonardo DiCaprio decides to move to daytime television... MORE »

Article by natkirst
January 29, 2013

Mizzou’s Twerk Team Turns Heads, Werks Dat Booty

Mizzou’s best-kept secret, its Twerk Team, has gained a substantial amount of notoriety this week after a record seventh place finish at the Middle America Collegiate Twerking Classic. Competing against fourteen teams from neighboring states, the Tiger twerkers proved not just to Missouri, but Illinois, Arkansas and other less relevant nearby states (Kansas) that there... MORE »

Article by carolineoreilly
January 17, 2013

Gay men everywhere speak out in support of Manti Te’o: ‘We’ve all been there.”

Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te’o has recently come under fire since it was discovered that his late girlfriend, Lennay Kekua, never actually existed. In spite of the allegations and subsequent media frenzy, one group has surprisingly and publicly come out in support of Te’o: the gay community. “So what, he made up his girlfriend? That... MORE »

Article by natkirst
January 8, 2013

Cool College Guy Claims He’s Really Into Sports And Having Sex With Women

Last Thursday night Freshman Doyle Matheson admitted in conversation with a member of the opposite sex that he was “really into sports.” “Ladies love guys that are really into sports,” said Matheson, “which explains why I get it in on the regs.” As evidence of his love of sports, Matheson receives ESPN updates to his... MORE »

Article by carolineoreilly
December 28, 2012

The Story of Syllabus Week

Syllabus Week, known as the “Festival of Natty Lights” to many, will soon be upon us once more. Though widely celebrate by most college students, there are many who have forgotten the true meaning of the weeklong celebration. To remind us why we celebrate Syllabus Week, we have decided to retell the story of how... MORE »

Article by drewthegoose
December 14, 2012

Student Decides He Suffers from ADHD after Taking Adderall

A University of Missouri student decided Sunday that he suffers from ADHD after taking a dosage of the drug adderall. Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, or ADHD, is a psychiatric and neurobehavioral disorder most commonly associated with inattentiveness. The disorder has grown in popularity over the last decade thanks to a combination of awareness for the... MORE »

Article by drewthegoose
November 30, 2012

Chubby Student Insists That There Really is a “Mizzou 72”

A University of Missouri student was hospitalized Wednesday after being arrested for allegedly libeling Mizzou Dining. Tanner Bearington, a freshman at MU, was playing Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 in his dorm room when a S.W.A.T. team broke in. The team was working with the Columbia Police Department in a coagulated (syrupy) effort to... MORE »