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Article by JClassy
January 27, 2012

Who Said Yes to That?

When I think about what a wonderful place WashU is, my heart warms immensely.That being said, there are a couple things that I don’t quite understand, and I often ask myself, “WHO SAID YES TO THAT?” -Only leaving room for three booths in the Whispers floor plan.-Spicy pistachio nuts instead of goldfish as Whispers snackbites.-No... MORE »

Article by Lia Woodward
January 25, 2012

New college restaurant opens, “Ramen & Pepperoni Sandwich” gets rave reviews

Campus was all atwitter in reaction to the opening of the latest, hottest restaurant in town: LiSa’s College Restaurant. Note the prominent S that definitely makes the name LISA and not LIA. I most certainly am not responsible for starting this restaurant, probably. Moving on, last week LiSa’s College Restaurant opened its repainted door (that... MORE »

Article by emcorbet
January 10, 2012

Best Pranks to Play On Your Roommates If You Get to School Before Them (Cuse)

This article is part of our “Let’s Keep This Website Awesome Over Winter Break” Tournament series. Check out the opposing article here and be sure to ‘like’ your favorite! 1. Cover the room in sand and bring in a new roommate. Tell them they’ve been voted off the island. 2. Set up a live studio... MORE »

Article by USC Staff
January 4, 2012

Happy Belated Birthday to USC Campus Basement!

You know you’re getting old when you forget your own first birthday. Fortunately, one of our mottos (and we have a lot of them) around the writers’ room is “Who really needs pants anyway?” Another motto of ours is “it’s never too late to celebrate!” With that in mind, we’d like to tell the story... MORE »

Article by Leah Folta
December 24, 2011

A College Christmas Carol: Whiskey, Time Travel, and Matt Barkley

I down my entire Holiday Winesky Nog (wine, whiskey, egg nog, and cough syrup, because you’re only young once) in record time, my sixth mug celebrating the same number of potential love interests who stopped messaging back this week on a stupid dating site I don’t care about even a little bit at all. I’d spent all day not... MORE »

Article by SupermanThatPo
December 24, 2011

Santa Only Servicing Jews for 2011 Christmas Season Due to Economic Recession

If you pray to the infamous Jesus Christ and were expecting Santa to slide down your chimney this December, keep your partridge in your pear tree, folks, “cause it’s not happening. December 25, 2011 marks just the second time this has ever happened. The first time was on the 13th day of Abib, 33 AD,... MORE »

Article by Lia Woodward
November 23, 2011

Students fly home to celebrate National Haircut/Long Distance Breakup Weekend

It’s an exciting time of year. Late November.   Classes end early, beards are in full swing, everybody travels near and far to be among friends and family, people buy extra food, all to celebrate one very important American holiday: National Haircut/Breakup weekend.   Since this great nation’s birth, the week of November 24th has... MORE »

Article by Ian Arnold
November 14, 2011

Best Bushes To Piss On After Drinking

   Pissing in public whilst moderately intoxicated is nothing new. The body has a high level of urgency when removing potentially excessive amounts of alcohol. Combined with the fear of public scrutiny should one’s bladder evacuate prematurely in a public forum. Results include, but are not limited to, urinating on the sides of buildings and... MORE »