Break in Review
Ok, so it’s been about a week since we’ve updated this site. And sadly, because we live in Syracuse, absolutely nothing happened. So here’s our best attempt to make it sound like you missed a shitload of stuff (read: basketball) during spring break when you were home remembering why you love being back at school. (In a few weeks, you’ll get sick of it here and wish you were home. Stop complaining and make up your mind!)
“¢ The Orange decided they didn’t want to embarrass Georgetown at the Big East tournament, and also that they could never match last year’s performance, and so they decided not to play. For more information on this game, see our previous article about November 3, 2009. In addition, Arinze Onuaku went down with a knee injury. There is no joke to make here, we desperately need him back. Although, our performance against Gonzaga suggests otherwise”¦
“¢ Revenge came in the form of the Catamount (whatever the hell that is; I suspect it’s what happens when a Hoya gets mauled by a Mountaineer). Those of you with any knowledge of Syracuse sports history know that 2005 was a repulsive year for Orange fans, as Vermont upset the then 4-seed Syracuse Orange in the tournament. History would not repeat, and the Orange, led by a healthy Wes Johnson, destroyed the Catamount.
“¢ What happens when a Catamount gets raped by an orange? It turns into a Zag. And it looks ugly. Kind of like a Hoya, except without the air of douchebaggery. The Orange plowed through the Zags and they are now Gon (see what I did there?) from the tournament.
That’s about it. So if you don’t like sports, you didn’t miss anything. And if you do like sports, then you knew all of this anyway. So you just wasted a few seconds of your life. Idiot.
Oh, and there was some sort of alien invasion, but more on that later. It’s not as important as the NCAA tourney.