Ramapo has been doing all it can to ensure a more ‘green’ and economic campus over the past few years. In an effort to be even more sustainable, the executive board has confirmed its decision to only activate the college’s sprinklers during rainstorms. Whether it be a light drizzle or torrential monsoon, hundreds of expensive, energy sapping devices will be there to assist nature’s doing. Watering systems will not be used on any dry or hot days in order to conserve. The grass may whither and die, but this is a small price to pay for a more sustainable campus.
It’s very important to make sure that the grass becomes as submerged and soaked as possible during a rain shower. The plants will appreciate being pounded by a ludicrous amount of water. “As I always say,” One board member comments, “If life gives you lemons, use your own very expensive and unnecessary lemons in addition to those lemons so you have tons of lemons.” After a moment, he leans in and whispers with a smile, “By ‘lemons’ I mean ‘water’.”
Due to its already somewhat green color, grass will not be the main focus of the sprinklers. Instead, sprinklers will be aimed at walkways, buildings, and students. With this plan, everything will receive nutrients that only water provides and grow to be nice and strong.
In the future, Ramapo hopes to further its environmental friendliness by ending its recycling program and requiring students to include 10 extra pages of scribbled on computer paper with each assignment they hand in.