A recent debate has been the cause for tension at the University of Missouri as people fight over the right for students to drop classes during the semester.
Tensions have risen over the course of the spring semester regarding an age-old debate concerning dropped classes. As a result, two opposing camps have emerged representing either side of the argument. “We just want to let people know that these are our classes, no one else’s,” said sophomore Lindsey Marie. “The pro-classers are just trying to make us out like devils because we’re ok with dropping classes. I’m not proud of this. In retrospect, I should’ve practiced safer selection, but it’s all in the past now.”
Individuals who identify themselves as “pro-classers” have arranged rallies – one even featuring keynote speaker Rick Santorum – in order to get their message across. “If it were up to me, I’d have students meet with an advisor as soon as their schedule is conceived,” said the failed presidential candidate. “If there’s one thing that I’m not ok with, it’s people making decisions about their lives that have nothing to do with me.” Santorum spoke to a crowd of over five-thousand on his farewell tour across states that don’t explicitly hate him.
The pro-student campaign set up a booth in the Student Center all day Friday, handing out buttons and selling t-shirts that said: “My Student Body, My Choice.” Junior Marcus Bedsworth spoke to a gathering of students in the afternoon. “We aren’t asking for a whole lot. Students should be able to drop classes up to two-thirds of the way through the semester. If a student has a class forced on them, they should be able to drop it without reason,” said Bedsworth. “If someone isn’t ready to take a class, then they shouldn’t be subjected to a possibly GPA-changing semester.”
Another less-prominent group made their presence known as they protested outside of Planned Studenthood, a university-run organization geared towards educating students about class schedules, as well as helping students drop classes. “We’re here to voice God’s anger at these heathens,” said protestor Ricky Josiah. “It’s unnatural; if God wanted kids to drop classes then He would have said so in the Bible. But it wasn’t in there, so it’s an abomination.” Josiah danced around with a sign that said “Stop Terminating Innocent Classes” all day Friday.
Jack Donaghan, local priest at the Newman Center, was able to shed some light on the debate. “Classes begin at legislation. The Bible suggests this in 2 Kings: 23-24,” said Donaghan. He later went on to say that he “has never ever touched a little boy, how old is that joke?”
As a result of the debate, a petition has circulated around campus over the last two months, garnering over two-thousand signatures calling for an official vote on the issue. While a date has not yet been chosen for the vote, University of Missouri officials expect the process to cost over a hundred thousand million dollars.