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Creepy Craigslist Ad of the Week; Can I pee in your butt??
Shortly before President Obama was elected into office the nation was racked with fear that he might be of the Islamic faith. Now, with the 2012 election looming, it appears that Obama’s religion will be questioned once more. What voters need to know, however, is that there are more pressing issues regarding Obama that must... MORE »
The music industry is a vast uncharted place, filled with complete and utter genius and a large amount of shit. We as a generation control the music that surrounds us, and we have failed to inspire songs that actually have meaning or worthy lyrics in the past decade. The year of 2011 has truly... MORE »
Much to presidential hopeful Rick Santorum’s dismay, California’s 9th Circuit ruled that the infamous Proposition 8, which would ban gay marriage in California, was deemed unconstitutional. In response, Santorum used words like “absurd” and “judicial tyranny.” He also vowed that he would fight to overturn the ruling should he be elected president. “It’s hard to... MORE »
5. Tornado Siren: They will cock their head, collect their valuables and move to the basement. 4. Someone Logging in to AOL: They patiently wait for “the AOL guy” to say you’ve got mail. When he doesn’t, they will say, “Someones probably using the phone, that’s why it’s taking so long.” 3. The TV: “Honey! The sound... MORE »
When Chancellor Brady Deaton announced MU was moving to the SEC, Columbia residents knew many things would be changing so the University would better fit into the more southern culture. At the forefront of their concerns: Kentucky Fried Chicken. The lack of Colonel certified buckets of finger lickin’ goodness... MORE »
This past Monday Chancellor Brady Deaton opened his house to the public, offering views of his ostentatious and overwhelming Christmas decorations. Brimming with memories, alumni walked the halls of the house with their insolent children in tow, making certain to glance back every once in a while to remind their child that this was their... MORE »
It’s getting toward the end of the year, and my writers are getting bored as shit. So, this is what I’ve come up with to occupy their time. It’s a little contest I like to call, “The Biggest Bullshiter.” And yes, I’m aware that’s not grammatically correct. I’ve given each writer a mythical creature to... MORE »
On April 1, 2012 the Maneater, Mizzou’s primary newspaper, published their annual April Fools Edition. This year’s title: the Carpeteater. After years of doing an April Fools edition, their reign has come to an end with their latest edition of the Carpeteater. Not only did they throw in slurs toward women but managed to insult... MORE »
So, each week we propose ideas, we sit in our tiny little meeting room and attempt to make you and the rest of the people surfing the web show some teeth. These are all of the dunce pitches, the one who no one actually wants to write a story about but we feel as though... MORE »
I don’t know what this “Reason Rally” is, but apparently it’s a big party for atheists who enjoy spreading their words of wisdom…and…well, eating babies. MORE »
Cross country runner turns into pile of sticks Tiny dancer actually kind of fat Flat branch restaurant not actually frat branch, disappointed squirrel discovers Spanish turns out to be kind of a dick, no longer a romance language Local Satirist Runs Out of Ideas Smug Pile of Rags Mistaken For Journalism Student Mac pulls partnership... MORE »
In a recent interview presidential candidate Rick Santorum said, “The indoctrination that is going on at the university level is a harm to our country.” After hearing these wise words thousands of students around the world rebelled against their institutions all with the campaign, “Puppets no more!” Santorum is widely known to have a concrete... MORE »
“dead cats” (Vegas bound&gaggd) Date: 2012-02-11, 12:46PM CST I have a box full of them Anybody know a good place to dispose em? Well, Craigslist has hit a new creepy low. Let’s analyze. 1. Headline; dead cats.- I don’t like where this is going. 2. Vegas bound and Gaggd- uh.. so apparently this guy has... MORE »
Since the dawn of unathleticism and staggering bitterness, web cretins have used memes (pictures of people/animals, each with a distinct and odd personality), to convey their wittiness to the great wasteland that is the Internet. For instance, the Insanity Wolf meme: a picture of a crazed wolf’s head embossed on a black-and-white background. Insanity Wolf’s... MORE »
Dorial Greene-Beckham, Mizzou’s new football pride and joy, may have gotten most of the recognition, but he wasn’t the only one recently picked up by Mizzou. Mizzou also received the ESPNU’s 387th ranked player, Gene Troust, and he claims he deserves recognition as well. “I have worked so hard to play football in college, and... MORE »
We all have our pet peeves. For some, it’s mayonnaise. For some, it’s the morning after a rough night when all you want is a water bottle. And for others, it’s the mirror pictures that 11-year-olds post to show their mosquito bites. For me, it’s when the gay community is disrespected. In my hometown of... MORE »
Alright guys, lets play a game. Everyone knows that the advertising industry is generally pretty slanted, they have to be. Heck, they won’t ever sell anything if they aren’t (I mean really, who gives a shit about the Forever Lazy and it’s ass flap?). The advertisers play directly to what the public is watching. A... MORE »