February brings a lot to the table as the second month of the year. We’ve got Valentine’s Day, President’s Day, and the all too important Canadian Heritage Day. But one day in particular has got me feeling like I’ve inhaled too many nail polish fumes – Siblings Day. Why, do you ask? Simple: I am an only child. It’s nice seeing other only children just as it is nice noticing the other black person in the room. At first, we can’t even believe we’re seeing each other, but then there is a friendly smile, a head nod, and possibly even a hug if we’re desperate. But, I digress.
What’s a girl to do on this day? Homework? Community service? Both of those things are boring and are not focused on me (as all things should be). I have complied a list of tips for the other only children on campus to enjoy themselves on this day while their friends are hanging out with their families.
Tip #1: Eat your heart out. Literally.
When has eating ever failed you? So what you’re on “a diet”. So what you “can’t have too much sugar after your heart was proven to be a little too weak.” Doctors, schmockters. Eat till your weak little heart is content today because frankly, you have nothing else to do. You will eat so much that you’ll get tired, which segways perfectly into the next step.
Tip #2 Sleep
Now unlike eating, this is something you can get tired of. Plan a sleeping schedule that goes as follows:
8:00 am – Wake up
8:30 am – Shower
9:00 am – Put on new, clean pajamas
9:10 am – 3:00 pm – Sleep
Do this until you are tired of sleeping and then move on to the next step.
Tip #3 Make a sibling out of glue and rice**
This is self explanatory. Get creative with all that rice! You want a sister? A brother? Anything you want. You are God (for a day). Use spaghetti for hair and grapes for eyes. Woah that’s a good looking sister you got there!
Well there you have it! A comprehensive guide for all you only kids out there. We left no stone unturned so your day will go swimmingly. Remember: Eat. Get tired. Sleep. Create a sibling using rice. Repeat.
**If you don’t have rice and glue, a mop will suffice.