Sophomore Emma Kirshin was sent home this week by Gannett health services after failing to display “an adequate level of cultish love and fervor” for her little.

New sorority pledge and little Abby Tanger was upset when she entered her room to find only cookies, balloons, and candies. Standard protocol dictates that bigs must shower their littles with gifts valuing at least seventy five dollars. 
The frustrated Abby told Campus Basement that the market value of her gifts was only about forty dollars, and remarked, “my roommate got a pony from her big.” Emma was sent home by Gannett after being told she was “unstable” and “unfit for the tribulations of sorority life.”
This story follows recent reports of a big who purportedly “ate her little in a fit of manic love and devotional rage.”