As things happen and time flies, Cornell adjusts its’ rules every year to make sure that students study in a happy, stress-free environment. This year is no different, as Cornell has placed five new rules in effect for the coming school year. Here is a breakdown of all five:

 

- No sunglasses inside classrooms

This may seem like a no-brainer, but the truth is there was never a written rule in place to be enforced. It was one of those things out of respect that a student was supposed to do, but many still did it anyways, so Cornell has officially banned sunglasses in class. Sorry frat-bros, the penny with sunglasses combo is now illegal, so go find a new outfit.

- No bicycles on the front of buses

This is my favorite of all of the rules. If you own a bicycle, freaking ride it. Do not put it on the front of a bus because you do not want to sweat riding up a hill. It was your decision to bring it, so ride it until your shirt turns from light blue to navy.

 

- Printing now $1/page

I don’t quite understand this one, but seems like just another ploy to get some more money. You might as well go buy a printer now because one study guide is going to cost you $45 plus all of the effort and time finding the person who made the study guide.

- No smoking on campus

A couple of months ago, we ran an article about this. It all started off as a joke, but Cornell has made it a reality. You cannot smoke within 1,000 feet of a Cornell building. So basically, wherever you stand on campus, you are within 1,000 feet of a Cornell building. My new recommended spots for smoking are the Cornell Plantations and the Commons.

 

- No BRB purchases under $5

This one is a real killer. Cornell is basically trying to get you to spend your Big Red Bucks as quickly as possible. Poor you, poor me.

 

Some serious rules are being instituted this year,  so be aware that you don’t break any. If you do, you will be thrown out of the university for unspecified violations of rules.