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Good Deer Hunting
made for the Bryant viral video contest
Bryant Plans to Hire Rod Blagojevich in 2026
Former Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich, was sentenced to fourteen years in federal prison several weeks ago on charges of mail and wire fraud and solicitation of bribery while in office. Yesterday, Bryant announced that Blagojevich will be added as one of the university’s newest faculty members “immediately following his departure” from prison. As a... MORE »
Students Rave About Trojan Brand’s “Bear” Skin Condoms
Trojan Brand Condoms’ newest product launch, the Trojan BareSkin condoms, has been one of this year’s hottest new items in premarital pregnancy prevention. The new product claims to be 40% thinner than the leading brand and made of traditional latex materials. One of the largest misconceptions (no pun intended) of the new Trojan BareSkin condoms... MORE »
“New” Bryant Center Reportedly to Become Hogwarts Replica
Reports of a “new” Bryant Center have been the talk of the Bryant University campus for the past couple of weeks. Since its resurrection in the mid-1980s, the Bryant Center has had little to no renovations to keep up with the rest of Bryant’s more modern appearance. Outdated furniture, limited office space, unsatisfactory dining... MORE »
Sports: Little sisters of the poor draws in exhibition games against Bulldogs.
A group of nuns are very upset about a common phrase using their organizations namesake. They were especially resentful when Gordon Gee (Commissioner at Ohio State University) commented that in the Big 10 football conference “We don’t play little sisters of the poor,” obviously implying that nuns who are part of this organization are weak... MORE »
Students Speak Out About “Students Speak out”
Sophomores Josh Cutting, William, and Maria are upset about the students speak out section. When asked, they cited that the recent Archway section didn’t actually talk about relevant issues. “I’m not talking, wondering or thinking about fucking bricks.” These students are upset because real issues on campus could be recognized in the student newspaper... MORE »
Press Release: Apple to Launch Siri-powered Microwave by End of 2011
Executives at Apple knew as far back as 2009 that the company planned to eventually build its own microwave oven, sources told Toby Kennedy of the Boston Globe. Jobs had reportedly been mastering plans and executing a SWOT analysis which would help Apple enter the competitive consumer appliance market. The innovative food cooking device, called the Apple... MORE »
Geese continue to ‘Occupy’ university campus. Student residents begin to feel the impacts
Campus occupiers continue to ravage the Bryant University campus. Student residents are beginning to feel the stress and impact of the ever present, and ever growing Canadian goose population. “Our beautiful campus is littered with goose shit! I can’t walk to class or to the library without stepping on a fecal land mine,” said Junior... MORE »
Bryant to move back to original Providence campus after dispute with Mowry family
Reports published in several local town records indicate a civil dispute between distant family members of John Mowry and Bryant University. The Mowry Farm was the original estate belonging to the 420 acres where the current Bryant campus stands today. Prior to selling it’s land to Earl Tupper, the Mowry family included a “sale of... MORE »
Bryant Bans North Face Jackets, Citing Lack of Diversity
Bryant University is set to ban North face sweatshirts, effective November, 1st, 2011, in an effort to promote diversity. The Dean of students says that “this move will help to distinguish Bryant students from one another”. This action is a result of a recent report by the Diversity, Inclusiveness, Community, and Knowledge committee. The D.I.C.K.... MORE »
Conversations 1.2 Nickleback
In this comic strip, we see that guys are guilty of weird shit too. MORE »
That Girl
Oh, the joys of my college years. T’is given me the opportunity to meet so many types of people and get to know them (mostly by Facebook stalking). Alas, t’is also implies forced cohabitation with some of the most unlikable people on this watery earth. Now, as we advance, it seems like we meet fewer of these people and... MORE »
Michelle Duggar: Smarter Than Her Vagina Lets On
Does your vagina hang low? Does it wobble to and fro? Can you tie it in a knot? Can you tie it in a bow? Can youthrow it o’er your shoulder Like a Continental Soldier? Does your vagina hang low? Normally, if I wrote about a family with 19 children I’d have lost my audience by the... MORE »
Dean’s List
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My Sadly Un-Slutty Self
As a very different breed of girl, I have always admired the ‘slutty’ girls at Halloween. While my fellow females display what is, at first glance, characteristic snappy bitchiness and exaggerated sense of self worth and piety, I prefer to look at these girls as showing what is superlative of the “weaker sex.” I look... MORE »
Syracuse Students Protest Westboro Church
Stand up for what you believe. Source: save-the-world-one-day-at-a-time.tumblr.com MORE »
15 Lateral in 62 Seconds – This is College Football
End Zone angle of the final play of Trinity vs. Millsaps Football. Down 24-16 with just over two minutes to go, Trinity’s Riley Curry scored to cut the lead to 24-22. After a missed two point conversion attempt, Trinity’s defense held Millsaps to a three-and-out without using any timeouts. The Tigers were left with two... MORE »
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