Article by Sdolph2
November 5, 2011

Students Speak Out About “Students Speak out”

Sophomores Josh Cutting, William, and Maria are upset about the students speak out section. When asked, they cited that the recent Archway section didn’t actually talk about relevant issues. “I’m not talking, wondering or thinking about fucking bricks.”   These students are upset because real issues on campus could be recognized in the student newspaper... MORE »

Article by Sdolph2
November 2, 2011

Press Release: Apple to Launch Siri-powered Microwave by End of 2011

Executives at Apple knew as far back as 2009 that the company planned to eventually build its own microwave oven, sources told Toby Kennedy of the Boston Globe. Jobs had reportedly been mastering plans and executing a SWOT analysis which would help Apple enter the competitive consumer appliance market.   The innovative food cooking device, called the Apple... MORE »

Article by Sdolph2
November 1, 2011

Herman Cain talks to Clarence Thomas’ Lawyer: Seeks Support

In the wake of the new allegations about harassment allegations, GOP Presidential hopeful Herman Cain is seeking assistance from a familiar ally. This isn’t the first allegation on Herman Cain’s record. An unnamed source believed to be from Pizza Queen in Providence Rhode Island has commented saying that “”¦godfather pizza was harassing [Pizza Queen] with... MORE »

Article by Sdolph2
October 31, 2011

Geese continue to ‘Occupy’ university campus. Student residents begin to feel the impacts

Campus occupiers continue to ravage the Bryant University campus. Student residents are beginning to feel the stress and impact of the ever present, and ever growing Canadian goose population. “Our beautiful campus is littered with goose shit! I can’t walk to class or to the library without stepping on a fecal land mine,” said Junior... MORE »

Article by Sdolph2
October 28, 2011

Bryant to move back to original Providence campus after dispute with Mowry family

Reports published in several local town records indicate a civil dispute between distant family members of John Mowry and Bryant University. The Mowry Farm was the original estate belonging to the 420 acres where the current Bryant campus stands today. Prior to selling it’s land to Earl Tupper, the Mowry family included a “sale of... MORE »

Article by Sdolph2
October 28, 2011

Bryant Bans North Face Jackets, Citing Lack of Diversity

Bryant University is set to ban North face sweatshirts, effective November, 1st, 2011, in an effort to promote diversity. The Dean of students says that “this move will help to distinguish Bryant students from one another”. This action is a result of a recent report by the Diversity, Inclusiveness, Community, and Knowledge committee. The D.I.C.K.... MORE »