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Dear DPS, What do you guys do anyway? I mean, besides stand around guarding our Mayfest from non-existent potential intruders…? I really don’t understand it when I call at 4am needing an escort to South Campus, and you tell me that you CAN’T drive me there, but you CAN drive me to College Place where... MORE »
THE MOST DEPRESSING PLACE EVER, BUMBLEFUCK— Syracuse University student Chris Davis was hospitalized due to hypothermia brought on by exposure to freezing temperatures Sunday morning while walking back to his apartment because the Department of Public Safety refused to offer transportation. At about 2 p.m. Monday afternoon, the Syracuse Police Department received a call from... MORE »
A Very Scientific Study on the Most Effective Methods to Target Motor Coordination & Cognitive Ability on Campus
Subtitle- (read: How to Get Exercise at SU) Doing LaundryTargets: Back, Abs, Ability to distinguish and categorize colorsDifficulty Level: SU GirlsIncrease Intensity by: Folding it Flint/Day Hall StairsTargets: Butt, Legs, Thighs, Your soulDifficulty Level: Giving BirthIncrease Intensity by: Dragging your wasted roommate up with you at 4 a.m. Opening Glass Doors at SchineTargets: Biceps, Triceps,... MORE »
Dear Person Who Cheated Off Of Me Today, First off, you shouldn’t assume that I’m a reliable source for answers (or that I’ll be passive about you using me) just because I’m Asian. Yeah, that’s right. I saw you eye me down right before you carefully chose your seat and moved EXTREMELY close to me... MORE »